Mars Exulti/My personal Mayday

I could not hold back my tears,  I was deeply touched and I was deeply moved the face of the heroism of this seemingly ordinary woman who was   forced, by specific circumstances to undergo the “Daenerys Targaryen” phase, to experience a nervous breakdown, to cast out her humanity when necessary, to be raped, beaten, to endure what it cannot be endured, to survive her evildoers and the whole twisted nazi Gilead society and to become a fucking superhero. 

whoever watches this series knows what I mean when I mention ex USA, Republic of “praise be” Gilead where women are tortured and mutilated if they want to read a book or be sent as concubines from home to home, from one commander to another, as well as with their wives to be raped in an obscene, profane ceremonial ritual in the name of the Lord as a concubine for “ecological disaster and birth defect”, where girls are raped at 14 while forcing them to pray to the Lord to be wives and mothers and where they cut their clit if they, for example, wear the wrong dress or  fall in love, where fertile women are handmaids, and all others are Unwomen, forcing them to die in poisonous colonies to work   until they fall apart, piece by piece of their bodies due to toxic gases .. public hangings are everyday. with prayer, watching is a must, as well as participating in pulling a rope, stoning, too .. This woman eventually became the boss of the monstrous Gilead, took matters into her own hands and became the one who is in charge. A woman respected by the greatest villains and architects of Gilead. How the hell did she do that? this is a hypothetical question, and this woman should be a role model for anyone going through difficult times.

in this time of indifference to human suffering, a character interpreted by Elisabeth Moss (the best actress I know, and know a lot about the art of acting) by Margaret Atwood’s book “The Handmaid’s Tale”, I thought of every tear that is shed every moment in the world; each different, and together they form an ocean of despondency that invokes compassion and consolation.

.Most cathartic my tears are those caused by seeing from this example of human exaltation; I was looking at tears in these people, I saw all those who were separated violently from a dear person, I have seen   tears of grandparents, mothers and fathers, children in hands of evil people who would have been deprived of their childhood had it not been for the heroism of female Moses June Osborn. My tears called for comfort and with their answering tenderness, I wipe the sorrow from my heart.

it is the testimony and story of an ordinary woman, struck by a tragedy called Gilead that saved more than 52 children of Gilead and a bunch of martyred and enslaved women by providing them with a plane to keep them safe, fleeing persecution and cruel violence, people and children who were victimized, raped, tortured, mistreated in this newly constituted theocratic rapist country.

Someone in such circumstances, from abuse at the hands of ruthless people, becomes evil. Someone becomes human. Someone becomes larger than life. And that’s not a phrase – I saw it in everyday life, I saw (admittedly not much .. which is why it’s so precious) people with integrity, real heroes, real “Lara Crofts”.

And I learn from them.

And what have you done in your miserable life, you that acting tough and cocky, laundering money through your so-called legit businesses,  to think highly of yourself (and there is no person who doesn’t think nice about herself) did you save someone’s life? Is there a work of art created with your hands and mind? Look at June Osborne and people like her … what do you have to do with such humanity, you little thing?

I haven’t cried in years. I couldn’t…. be disgusted by the crowd of sociopaths among whom I currently live in a kind of Gilead .. honestly, I didn’t have the luxury of something like that .. a bunch of ruthless cowards whose sole purpose of living  is their miserable bare useless existing in fact, for example, to make someone’s life hell and enjoy their sadomasochistic psychopathy, their madness, madness and stupidity. To exist just one moment in time not to give a phone to a girl in need if she urgently needs help… to yell at someone at the counter, to say meaningless nonsense on the bus and to disappear afterwards .., to kick scared daughter out of the door while her mother is in hospital,  to steal, to lie, not to give a glass of water to the thirsty, I wonder: how did they dare to be born at all? who needs them? what is their purpose? Today I cried (amazed) because I know who I am, I know why I am, I know that there are others like me, that I am not alone and I am glad about that.


a bit of cynicism: I felt like a pope at a prayer vigil after watching this …

The Lord said, ‘I have seen my people in bondage, and I have heard their cry,’” she says in voiceover as the handmaids carry her through the woods. “I know their sorrows, and I have come to deliver them from the hand of evil men and lead my people out of that sorrowful place, to a land flowing with milk and honey.”
Those symbolism-heavy sentences are an inexact quote from the Bible, a book packed with fire, brimstone, and tragic martyrdom. In fact, the star of the Bible died in an attempt to save the souls of his people and create hope for the world. There are many New Testament lines June could have used to suggest that she, like Jesus Christ before her, has died (luckily she didn’t) for the good of mankind. Instead, her parting season 3 words come from the Book of Exodus, which follows Moses’ flight from Egypt with the Israelites. The Israelites, like the handmaids, were slaves until someone saved them from their abusive plight.
Be stronger than any odds stacked against you. hdhjdhj.jpg


art and taboo

taboo and art are mutually exclusive. I personally do not believe that there is anything that cannot be expressed through the verses. but, good articulation is important, because, with good articulation, the artist manages to nullify the mournful sense of shock over a scene of, for example, a realistic severed human head. Good concept, good articulation and – this ceases to be just a severed head. However, whole armies of “artists” think that it is enough to put their severed head on the gallery stump and that in doing so they have succeeded in ejecting their unprecedented artistic inspiration from themselves and presenting to the audience.
And the audience as the audience – when they see (their) severed head or severed vagina .. is overwhelmed by the natural rush of empathetic horror.
Big deal- Black & Decker chain saw under the balls ..
Really pulls the drawstring tight on your coin purse, huh?
Unintelligent. Art is played with taboos. Personally, to date, the most complete artists have run away from it – and even when used (taboos), it was in the function of honest, fair articulation (nudity on the Sistine ceiling) rather than shocking anyone.

The inscriptions of a stoic

As I sing in the cage, the verse comes as a reflection, as …. diversity.


The fragile time of human life
stretches in big words
it meditates for eternity
that will disappear
the moment the big words are complete

Human bodies
like clamped rings
they walk,
interwoven with steel joints
and springs
People imbue their minute fluids
into the ears of silence as they speak …

Poor kids drag their feet while walking,
ashamed of the shoe,
Marked kids laugh
their unguarded shoe,
The poor feel discomfort
The girls first looked at each other’s feet,
then at their faces



you are perverse to Didro’s
or rather Livia,
(Later …)
I’d love to call you Gorgon or Messaline.
to good and evil in a precise hour,
in the required and expected context
there is time left to give birth to tragedy

Noble vases
they break more easily
moon sucks lightning and out of real soap bubble
brandy for emperors
because they bring you gifts
if you awoke one day and find yourself
happy, however mighty might chill you into misery
suffice it, by bidding an anchorite
sail upon the restless darky shore
and long will you feed dread the willow branch foeman
do not let light give up again

I Am Easy To Find – just patiently check out my crazy Libra sign alter egos one by one

I always thought the astrologer was wrong about my horoscope, but looking at Alicia Vikander’s projects, I realize that we share a common infatuation (as well as a horoscope sign, we are both Libras) to beautiful visual statements that invite sophisticated audiences to philosophize about their own lives.
If the concept of Samsara is excluded from the narrative, we are all born, living and dying creatures. Or maybe not.
A fact that many do not accept – thanatophobia leads them to religion and faith in the afterlife – Most people fear death, at least a little. I believe that sincere believers and their opposite, those who do not believe at all, including myself, are least afraid of the end of their lives.
I Am Easy To Find is a short (about 25 minutes long) movie that conveys this not accepting or accepting death quite well. Both an album by The National (Alicia is their confirmed fan), and the movie are playful siblings who like to steal from one another. They both share music, words and certain aesthetic elements.
Like Alicia and I share our crazy Libra zodiac sign.. and we both played Lara Croft 2013 at least more than 40 times (as for myself, for no particular reason 🙂
I’m not interested in the band at all, but in Alicia’s short (and long )films, in general, and in Alicia, of course! (Love is in the air!)

I saw them all.

Between commercial  roles like those in the fantastically stupid movie Tullip Fever, the role on which La Usurpadora would envy her, that sweet Swedish lass,  flicka who looks like a Creole girl, Alicia, who would be the envy of Fiorella or the blind Esmeralda for who you would never think she’s gonna see again! .. or any heroine from Latin American soap operas would envy her commercial roles…,  meanwhile likes to play with avant-garde movie projects, mostly projecting her own self… (at least one of her “I” because every Libra is at least a duplicate personality .. (as if the director is looking through her mind, it’s all so insightful .. I bet Alicia who talks like a chatterbox, otherwise, would state something like this …

It’s famous Libra’s diplomacy, not to mention Alicia’s social gabble-gabble, because Alicia is, at least to my opinion.. all just not a devoted wife and mother. It seems to me that her life is a little more interesting than the universal mediocrity heroine in the film – at least when she is in the role of Lara Croft (sequel confirmed, 2020, by the way ..)

In fact, it seems to me that even for the mediocrity standards the life of a “Flicka” in the movie is boring to an Olympic degree. It seems to be a deliberate exaggeration – a parody, even.
The twist in this movie where Alicia fascinated me with her transformation is that there is no twist at all which is a cliche for me, and a disappointment for my dramatic nature – there is no big change in the whole heroine’s life, just small adjustments and tender regrets.
Sound, images and a certain feeling are the main elements that make this movie work, but the story is, however, surprisingly non-spectacular and that probably makes sense… As many art films are open to interpretation, many will see different things but trying to try out their own interpretation…
Honestly, if Alicia hadn’t starred in this movie, I wouldn’t have found anything to connect with, so – I have no interpretation, and I don’t like the band, too.
What I liked about it was Alicia quirkiness in the way of a “crazy Libra”, which I associated with completely and laughed sweetly at her exaggerations for which I have no particular interpretation but a statement: “It’s Alicia Vikander”. And I like, like most people, something or someone I can connect with. Also, the fact that the video was shot in beautiful black and white and subdued but also somewhat dynamic images work just fine…
Basically, the movie is about the desire of the majority to make the most of their lives, which brings pressure in the stages of life in the domain of work, family, home .. find the right husband, wife! Buy a house! Eat breakfast cereals! Logic dictates! Born! Die! Don’t die! Don’t be born! Have at least one child! an unrealistic challenge that is doomed to failure from the start. Life brings both failures and opportunities to make adjustments and choices that will always hurt us. Alicia captured well the fragility and elusiveness of that “substance.” That is why there is no place for noise and drama, but for an artificial and quiet way of film storytelling and agglomeration of life with music that is a reflection of the same. At least that was, perhaps, the intention of the director…
After watching the movie, I realized how I would not want to live, which is an absolute cinematic success and for that, I thank the entire film crew.
Alicia is already preparing a new commercial role, but I’m glad she left for and she will continue to feed her alter ego, for everyone’s enjoyment as well.

Till the next Lara Croft 2020 sequel, no more Tullip Fever, pretty please.

Sometimes one has to go mad to keep their sanity

The series “The Handmaid’s Tale” follows a woman (women) forced to live as a concubine under a fundamentalist theocratic dictatorship in the near future in a totalitarian Gilead, formerly the United States, where women have no rights.
In a dystopian disturbing world in which women are the property of a state, and cutting a hand or some other part of the body, psychological torture, public hanging … as punishment for reading a book (by a woman)
The adaptation of the novel by Margaret Atwood, “The Mystery of the Story”, is a story of life in Gilead’s dystopia, a totalitarian society in the former United States. Gilead, faced with an ecological catastrophe and a sudden decline in birth rate, rules on fundamentalism and militarism that wants to “restore traditional values.”
Sometimes one has to go mad to keep their sanity.



My favourite girl – Emily, Arya Stark of the Handmaid’s tale…I hope she will not be deported to Gilead… (+ she poisoned Commander’s wife in the colonies..)


in the last episode, Ofmathew is snapping .. The scene is very powerful.

The show’s protagonist, June, becomes less and less likeable or relatable …

It looks for the whole world, except for me. I respect her character even more than before. But do not listen to me, I’m in the Targaryen team. Bang!
In any case, the character development and dynamics are interesting. Given what she (June) has gone through and how much she has lost and sacrificed in the process, helping other maids, saving lives.. June seems to have nothing to lose. A passing phase or a dark side that will win. Point of her “change of course”: Offmathew ratted her to Aunt Lydia – why she can not see her daughter anymore. In the process, a person was killed, an old servant called Martha who, as a friend, helped her to reach her daughter. June attended her public hanging… Sounds familiar? 🙂

And I liked this one, too…


As someone has already said – Words cannot describe how am I disappointed in Serena.

As one of the few remaining fertile women, handmaid OfFred, now ofJoseph, real name – JUNE (Elizabeth Mos) is a servant in the Commander’s household and is part of the caste of women forced into sexual slavery, the last desperate attempt to restore the population. Emmy’s award-winning drama returns to the second season, which is characterized by June’s pregnancy and her persistent struggle for the release of her future child from the dystopian horror of Gilead. “Gilead is in you,” is the favourite sentence of Aunt Lydia. OfFred/OfJoseph and all characters will fight against this dark truth – or they will surrender.

The human race has completely failed because of emotions.

All emotions are one and the same: self-pity. Emotions are always between people and they occupy the space that should not exist. They mediate where there should be a direct touch.
When the emotions emerge, all forces should be imploded.
To do this, one needs to understand how it is created. It’s a program, as with the Russian scientist Pavlov.
Usually, mothers are the ones who teach children to react emotionally. It’s that frigging training we receive when we’re small and powerless to figure it out and resist it. This is THE mother-Medea who sacrificed us to misjudge others. Mothers are mostly intimidating children, so they learn. And the idea of caring mothers is to a large extent fake and fatal.
Mothers are mostly intimidating children, so they learn. And the idea of caring mothers is to a large extent fake and fatal.

Emotions are projections. That means, you project your emotions on someone and then he or she is for you only
a fraction, a part of some of your performances. In this way, you immobilize them, label them, you take away their freedom.
Look, when you offend someone, he or she immediately claims you owe him or her (apology, money, compensation).
It’s an emotional economy and it’s deadly. Look at those fools who, because of the cartoon of Muhammad, they go to bloody showdowns with anyone who gets in their way. It is a program that establishes power over people and
they obediently listen
because they can not understand what is happening to them and therefore they cannot resist to resist it.

The human race has completely failed because of emotions.

Plus, the same holds true for ideas. Emotions and ideas are complemented and successfully replaced. It’s all the same kind of programming.
And life itself, chemistry, physics, all is conditionality. Atoms are conditioned to react. We are conditioned by biochemical processes.
The only thing that we have and which does not condition us is our understanding, the ability to know what is actually happening and to distinguish and save ourselves at that point.

Watch just this saying: Logic dictates! That is, we are slaves, we are obligated to execute what “logic” requires. That’s “His master’s voice”. Slave conditioning.

Poetry should clearly expose this and mock it because it is in a superior position to clearly see all this scam.

From a strategic point of view, it is better for the wind to lift up all the rubbish so we can clearly see what is flying and what stands firm. Seize the opportunity and get rid of unnecessary delusions. It’s all that we, humans, can do, anyway. Of all that we have, the most valuable is our sense of humour. And the source of humour is pure knowledge. It is something much more reliable than emotions because it is indestructible unlike them.