Doodle’s song

See how beautiful the bird Scarlet is,

the big red bird in the garden

of the sick boy Doodle

Doodle will be murdered

in wooden – go – cart Sparta, so it is pure National Socialism!

Bathe the Doodle in wine!

Give him melanas zomos!

Today, Spartan children would be entitled to disability benefits, and Spartans ..

. with such a warrior charge in their blood, would be ready for ISIL!

Anyhow, the Apella de ISIS,

and a crowd of Spartans in them bowing ready for military service,

vote in the Apella.

No more rocks, just nuclear power plants!

Ibis bird.

The storm veered her off course, she fell into the garden and


Doodle – bury the bird.

*Sparta is alive! Doodle dies, next to the Obergupenführer –

the Spartan woman Amelia who raised Alcibidias.

Just like the Ibis. In the blood gushing from his mouth, the color of ibis feathers.

Helot grows into a bird ..

A jackal attacks a lion.

The jackal is Otherkin.

They will survive a supernova explosion, they spread the black plague in the 14th century, killing more people than Hitler would in three attempts

They are Rattus. Or a lizard.

He blinds by a lying spirit, revered as a god in Polynesia

(Wake up. Something’s going on. They’ll regret sleeping through this)

*The Dark Twins. The Unholy Duality of Machiavellianism and Psychopathy.

The Unholy Reptilian created the Dark Triad,

a term well known to retired psychiatrists under heavy drugs who have been too zealous in researching

the pathological forms I am talking about now,

The reptile must love itself dirty – with sad inferior self-love.

Self-love that does not love itself.

It’s a daily normal occurrence and I can’t help it.


The key sum of all things


Cello made of sponge

and rosewood

releasing a flow that is a unison

of hold-able


Of musicke


a short, tight strum,


worth the reed

the sap blood of living things has found

and will ink a new font

in what’s left of the human hour.

FILM: Film’s the mad black Easter egg

for a great many people.

under Phoenix brood, inhaling the smokes

of flesh &n’ blood.

Freudian, drowning in the human average,

id hearing the threat of being lock’t-in.

all set to a one-song opera.

damn good stuff.

Mediate on and harvest

to my level of capability

from these lighten bolts

disguised as roses,

these fences made from prism glass,

these marrows which no bone

of the human or the universe could turn aside:

But then, again, isn’t the key sum of all things best played on a harp

made of pyrite, snakes &n’ roses caught in the strum?


Iane, es

(Janus’ song

Janus’ loneliness

Janus dialogue)

Iane, es,

Own double-glazed

mirror in a room of deaf ears.

In a wide tongue of the

fox– Lurking Janus,

Ianus Geminus, hollow is the

callousness or your poor Atoll’s


from Chaos’commingling storm.

Before and after is a scar,

cesarean on the

abdomen in Ianuarius.

Immerses the body in the monochrome of


which you assemble and disassemble

as a mask under our

stiff bodies.

And then,



and Ianus-being-us.

Janus’ masks bark, day

and night, to knowledge and the

mischievous arts, to obscure tunnels in

hidden rooms

to celebrate…

Marriage of Shion and Pseudologoi

of a pensive turn.

In softer notes

command a multi-headed dog

roar, Theory of

empty shelves explained

Liar, liar– Pity me, strangers!

Ascend, January,


And so it began

that the dogs stopped


Photo Credit: Ianus by antonio mora


Water – Walker

Had I been the ghoulish goblin shark,

born immune to viruses brought by her invaders

Had I been Prometheus, the demigod who never brought fire

Or Cleopatra who held the feathered serpent on her breasts

instead of a cobra

Had I been in history where Cleopatra and Antony were never in love

Or the poem in the eternal procreation

Or the knife in the hands of Brutus

Had I been Joan D’ Arc whose schizophrenic innocence carved at least 14 churches

spotted along the coast of Japan

Had I survived seven hundred years of solitude….

I’d chase Sundogs in the sky causing the refraction of sunlight off tiny ice crystals

Above the Trans-Alaska Pipeline in midwinter,sundogs meld into a halo around the sun.

I would’ve been able to pour out gold from Odin’s finger

to build a shrine to the Dripper on a plateau in the hungry savannas

for starving children in the Horn of Africa

I would’ve look down the loophole to get out of the wager for Loki’s head

I’d resign Arabs and Christians

I’d raise Irbil, gentile monastery in Iraq

transformed into a field of powder

I’d wrap around Saint Guthlac scourge around Kafka and squeezed

until a demon flew out of his mouth.

The grateful Kafka never took off the belt and his madness never returned

.I would fiddle when Rome burned

I’d escaped Muslim captors during the First Crusade by swimming

swam all the way to France

I would have a bad weekend for our sins

I’d tear the Tower of Babel apart

I’d become pungent silence for the holy son whose blood is chiming incurable.

I can give you the (un) promised philosophy

I can give you unintelligible words and apologetics

of my own making

I can serve you verses on a trayof silver and create your own image

of a water-walkershrouded in the spirit of the times.

Photo Credit: Sea of ThievesThe Legendary Storyteller Tall Tale Guide


Prometheus, I feel your liver

Entangle the last light breaking

, as in no face with more jollity

In which hunger places its accumulated laws

,in the stomach

The world imagined blinds thirst,

(in a glass of lukewarm water)

’tis is a congested plum

of these identified walls

looking for their roots

in the cough scatter charred threads

This is the intensest sudden abyss of light

It is in that thought … here is our stretchy cave jewelry

close to the unaltered blood flow

seeks the bottom in the scattered veins

I’m out of things

I am beyond meaning

beyond words alone

Within clown absolute, a single clown

within a double who is braver and clearer than their…

lacuna silence.

In a double dream

in diurnal course,

’tis a light, a power, the performed paradise

Unbeknownst, here, now, those who have once heard that will never forget the sound

Unbeknownst, measured by Babylon from jaguar’s claw

the Unbeknownst, blade snapped short. Diamond cut.Behemoth’s horn

A name to fury had shrieked a name to…ages cursed with crowned liver

delighted with immortality

Prometheus, I feel your liver

stretch wide the lips of immortal fire

Eaten daily the amorous bread.


Me solum relinquatis*

me solum relinquatis*


The head of the orchestra

the Kapellmeister is up!

Ah mastery!

Hell’s spider lilies blossomlike thunder,

Sun,don’t swallow the passerby

(Are you able to ponder?)

One two three four

The hangman measures his rope

The hangman now, the digger now,

they dig and clutch and haul




Death fires




Death fire










Let me walk in pace

Towards the softness of the morning,

whitened sun measuring the hours

with ancient precision

like on four pedalled

Hornucopian dronepipe. …….

my feet mingle the sidewalk

Trudging The Road That plays Rossini

the asphalt is a hit in the middle.


(Here and there, I hear a bat of footsteps behind me.)

The world can be horrible, but not dirty.

In all that disgust, I kept my good taste

Back into my room,

and round, round, round in my room

But laugh and laugh and laugh!

You, you – pathetical, obsessive, neurological, what else..

yes.. softandweak

Octobass morning.

I cried and was




the blood

the ocean

I laughed and was – am

amid the cold, vacant garden,

wet laundry, dirty glasses and broken mirrors

of a vagrant fool with the bumpy ears.

(Let me scream)

You expelled me into the living pasture

you expelled me out of the gates of hell

to serve as a faithful slave towards the ground

I don’t hear my verses, nor the sound of their lovelines

sIt just wonders my whole life through…

those beasts persist in waiting to die no escape from clutches of death

Judas kissing at Getsemani

Dare its ravel by the road tween the kingdoms

Gallop, my horse.

Whence this voice, on seven waters of yours standing flash

dewdrops thirsty

In the entrails, a hellgrows the chalk-white arrows

I’m buoyant. In bliss,I tread, brazen-soled,


Be lost, be distant, between dream and life

all the fires extinguished in the hearths

all the dead who believe they are coming into this world

lives equally

As were all the other evils that I hugged

as were all the other evils that have surrounded me

of that low ascent,

you fountain with bashful woundsmidway upon the journey

gripped by cruelty’s serpents as I had all along on my back

(Let me kill you)

Turn yourself back to re-behold my foreign blood

eternally lost children for the monsters that greeted them

since in ill-doing through strange patterns of my childhood’s

Carne vale

Where witches go riding into which holes they go

from the bales of fear my private lunatic changes me

little Quasimodowith Huckleberry Finn’s quiet voice

* me solum relinquatis* leave me alone (latin)

Photo Credit: Vasko Takovski, Macedonia-based artist Vasko Takovski finds inspiration from horses to produce surreal fantasies. Using an array of vivid colors and varying landscapes,


When silence shortly breaks through the syllables

Bright through the eternal year

Of dragons roaring on the enchanted coast;

Entombed in its trains, ships, androidphones

Inglorious two faced porcupines swung down

from branch to branch

with their hell-scaped train,swift as the quivering needle wheels

Twinkling mystically in the nn spectred space

Offering Virgo withered fingers

O wit despised and dumb despair,

When silence shortly breaks through the syllables

or the polyphony of purple blinking bats


the seed erodes the bowel of life.

You sink into the abyss of sad evil,

you build the toweron the cape

of a pork sword.

Life is like that.

it is neither insolent nor magical drama

but a detail of an indifferent act

Against the Colossus – is gapes went forth,

Of the gape of tortured within the Giant;

The might of that perspective you shattered,the lightning

– it blasts in through our monsters ears

What a bewithced, unhappy session

Writhe with me and torturechambering with me

….the snuffed-out exam rigorosumperspective ……

Horror, dread and despairto anyone

with nerves of steel

scratch and rake of splintered

beneath the veneer of beauty deep


I want to be a Picasso Guitar artificial

42 strings, 4 necks, and 2 sound holes.

fire sounds are in fashion

Be careful not to burn yourself with this one!

Merely another liar

The masked messenger


some rag man from the bushsome back (h) end from the god

By wicked night!

Here is the hollows angry furrows

and the inflamed tongue set greedily to lick

The shining rhombohedron

and the flesh of the flesh of a tree;

which grows

Death, Thee, master of our civilizations,

ourdidacticisms, our dialectics, our métiers, our measures, our…

for which wave-driven machines

are you bat plant bringing

the pile of corpses without coffins

the pulse, grave, mute,the color, the fraction,

the hard life,the hard eternal life.

Let us not fear.

The Balloonman come

running from tree called life and the last essence!

he has to suffer from myth to myth,

Ew, ecumenical Mary.

make my soul conceive

to carry

so much for such a ridiculous point.


Author: Leila Leila Al SamarraiPhoto Credit: The Garden of Earthly Delights, Right Panel Acrylic Print, Hieronymus Bosch




Part One


This is a time for a single canopy
at the intersection of summer roads
This is a time for all
these dark blue little knights, harlequins,
had lost their sense of intrigue – from behind the mask
of a two-headed monster
Horn-rimmed thick glasses partially clouded
the murky look of the vulture.

And in false sleep you are born ruinous

The Andean bear pointed his muzzle at you.
His hair was like a cockatoo
after his crest was plucked out.
‘Tis the season of giving roses,
a golden petal for the first time seen

Petal, a complete structure shaped like a bone
within the red coffin of oasis
’tis the season of taking,
of implanting self-possession, is dictated by a trigger,
like a revolver trigger which tears down

every cell
in the great earthquake
each bar taken out by small grippers
bent toward the oath of time dying

Laugh, you… sniggering miniature knots
get sentimental, damn you
Imagine that you are intentional
Sensitive, of no consequence.

and what you saw – IT.
and what weighs upon the heart- cut it,
with a white noose
and around the Great Bear’s neck
From the fruit. From the crack


Part Two:


Rabies and foreigners.
They’re boiling
green fire.

Fighting them is impossible.
Their world survives, their red eyes are
aflame with a glow
of a killer’s sword.
They chop off heads, eat limbs,
and all of it together, as per a deal.
They shake after what they do to you,
fall to pieces – and they do not stop.

By the Apate, in the twilight
catch several and kill for Eirene
the gray-haired old East-European immigrant,
each breath making her larynx inflate.
Cancerous growth in her larynx are
aching to burst out.
As does the barrel of the gun peering from out
of a white rug wrapped and on her knees.

Do they paint, do they talk …
not only – All suitors of all sorts themselves enthral –
into the weaver-room; and there, there,
where the azure globe
of the Penelope’s needle burned
they leap forth, mortally self-wounded.

Spin…Spin Spin…Spin, you.. wicker backet!


Miss Good Willa and Her Miss Hyde

July, Belgrade

Once, and it wasn’t that long ago,

A year by fire spewing dragon reckoning,

Sat a certain Good Willa, ambassador from the

Balkans.With a woefully harried cough,

Dry wretches in the anxious,

Transpositions of fissioning,

Dejection divisioning in cognitioning.

Id and Ego in fracturing are dancing,

A new being born in the reckoning.

How she found herself in the Balkans was a


As well as much the rest of her her short but

strange life.In the beginnings; a new entity is screaming,

The being of her being stretching out from her decreeing

:”And the truth is that ultimately it’s less important who she is than I”

My eager companion mocks the metaphysical,

The ancient God’s and mystics.

Nisaba and Athena and Thoth in é-dubba


While I wrote my histories on Heathoremes’s

shore,In races of divine wisdom adores at holm-

currents folklore.

I – Jormungand!

I wade onto the devils’ blasphemy,

Chiselled inside collides,

Sphinx womb resides,

Where dead Oedipus,

Murders father-Chronos in time.

Tied to the flute of Pan,

from which the,

(un)maker Logos,

does not reach.

Cross mocks and chosen ones,

Beating ribs to broken,

Saint Peter-esque inverted token.

Awoken descendants of new Babylon towering,

Unborn children mourning quartering.

I – Malice striker!

I urinate into the Lethe,

Scattered the heads in their beds,

Of Pandora’s bastards,

I kiss the wound of Caesar,

As predicted by Genesis.

Good Willa ravaged tablets in malignant villa,

Short durations salacious malicious soul.

Drawing neurotics in patterning,

correspondingly lines crossed and shattering.

Making her trappings in curriculum splattering.

The wild watches accusingly, mocking; daft

minded creature weakling she.

Dubsar making donations in the night, curbing

poverty fight.

Because the world will be watching

.Burned and borned offspring of thoroughbred

Balkan fire.

The laden-with-glory seen afar poor charger,

War-steeds unrelenting hunting thunder.

Prey to torrenting Turks, battle of Horns plunder.

Of Hattin I ponder:

Willa, well meaning woundable sapped,

Division duality, dichotomy will remake,

Never again foul creature, the damn thing will

hear you.

I, Good Willa now shall this my choice be!

In tones taunting pamphlets articulation,

Fearful fantasy to frighten extremes to


Retreats born without intermissioning.

Fox terrier’s reaved of nastiness,

Princess screams hoary callousness ,

Go away you are not the devilish beast you think

you are!

Nameless creature I select without regrets,

Whispers in my ear: all man is ugly and vile.

In sardonic witch trail, should I…

Mock them with unquestionable brittle mind?

Utterances of the beast in me:

Carrying longs lists of Leonidas’s howling


Sword-fury seized by his own glorious runes.

Rapturous rampart blazed volcano, devils


The original thought croons lyrical thesis’s,

Praising glorifies the saviour, the torchbearer,

the dreamer, the believer.

Victorians swoons, in praise I pull out of these


And swear sacrificial fealty to sun and moon.

Sun worshipping bloom in eternal Junes.

Of rhapsodic worshipfully the sun in true

portraits of passion,

And a thousand spells dispatch,

As a thousand sacrifices summoning…

My perfect victory.


Look Back In Laughter 2

I remained in the city too long;
Money launderers and ferals of fascism at the temple,
Psychopathy, landlords and gargoyles of Hades,
Ticked the time of my anxiety agonies.
Inconsequential, just look back in laughter.

Scrying mirror celled phones scream light at zombied fright,
Tribaled in unthinking amorphous greys,
All thoughts delayed, philosophy forbade,
And I am banished from sight.
Look back in cackling.

With knived convulsions, he, throwing (my) poetry ferociously,
My books blades for harrowing Hades,
Cultist bastards out! Damnedable freakshow! Damnedable gargoyle!
I will slaughter your abhorrence with bare bloody hands…
…The dark will understand…
Look back in blackest laughter.

All the dinosaurs resting in me,
Bosch painting horrors imprisoning,
Revived in final clenches of human vulgarities.
Look back in mocking revulsion.

Diabolicus in blockus against stalkers seeking saccharine,
Lurkers performing following and flitting in fealty secrecy,
Diogenes mocking threnody beneath me.
Look behind you and chuckle.

Pharaoh’s prenatal in celestial womb,
Fetus feverish in supernova spasmal tomb,
The wheels of history bitterly consume.
Look back in laughter.

Dire desires drives for immortality.
Surviving slaughterhouses of foetal Ustase.
Gossips to trick track tumultuous trends,
Bends of claimed knowledge pretends.
Look back in howled hysterics

Blow dry magic torments and tricks,
To tame and reign hair she is unsatisfied with,
Primps and prods, baths and pedicure supplicate God’s,
Look back in laughter.

Bus ride’s between rooms,
Foul practicalities alchemy in bloom,
Niels Bohr atomic riots in gloom.
Look down in smiling derision.

Visions ignitions, Dubai dreams,
Luxury sensual collisions, minted pillows,
Spartan dishes fissions in asyluming delights.
It doesn’t matter…so…look back in laughter.

She maneuvers her demise into place,
Stratagem, strategies, tactics of replaced,
Cruel callous laws to sate.
Gorgon eyes to hide behind sanguined shirt,
Secret years she bares the tears growing it on her tit,
She digs sharp venomous teeth into it.
She sets the sacrifice of skin and flesh cancerous,
She wills Cerberus clock, let it tick, let it tock…
…until ends.
Look…look back in laughter.

Imps surround, push, pull, shove, harass, harry me.
But look to lacrimation she!
Struggles and sorrow, proud and pretence somnolent,
Desperate hollows in gambles,
In wilding fae’s, wasting away.
Look back in laughter.

Begging by crumbling fracturing fountain
Sleeping primal in public tempestuous transportation,
Are you insane? Why not give money to my children?
I use to have means like you.
Denarius jangling and dancing portents in my pockets,
Protect your drachma or find cruel fate at equal footing,
And the thronging crowds will cast pitying bones;
“Look at the poor thing, insane! What’s wrong with your head!”
Look back in laughter.

The meter is running and there is no room at the inn,
No apartments to appeasements begin.
She was once alluring in elegance untold.
Brought onto Caucasus from Egypt,
By the sons of Ommaya as per ibn Shaprut’s order,
The minister of Abd al-Rahman III and Sebikhasim,
Enslaved, slandered and scold, humiliated, depleted…sold.
A demigoddess of fulsome breasts,
Luxurious hair and pursed plump lips.
Look back tittering in tragedy.

Rejecting the Omayyad caliph,
He told Shaprut to sell Selima to the Khazar King Josef,
To do as he pleases, and this Hebrew king made Selima,
The slave-woman of Allah.
Selima slender, demure elegant unshakable bamboo,
With disgusts in her squealing breathe taking escaping.
Look back in ironic displacing.

Psychopaths along the rode trode dynastic,
Torchbearers of infinite Emperors.
He’s smells blood on the wind, he smells the sweat of victim,
…He smells competition.
Look back in laughter.

Look around…nobody…
Something, someone?…nothing…
Somebody?…nobody in crowns…
Nobody gone to ground…
Nobody is found…
Tomes of related wisdoms nauseate,
The numbers in cruelty mean fate.
Stare intently in tactical laughing.

Strings bind to me in unbreakable unremorseful,
The past hunts behind me.
Medusa drinks me in marbled glass,
In the cruel poison of her irony.
Visages transfixed, trapped in ivory.
Inconsequential…just look back…in laughter.

©® Leila Samarrai


Look Back In Laughter

I remained in the city too long;
Money launderers and ferals of fascism at the temple,
Psychopathy, landlords and gargoyles of Hades,
Ticked the time of my anxiety agonies.
Inconsequential, just look back in laughter.

Adrift from celestial home, cosmic child,
The world reviled, I am alien lost on sordid shores,
Differentiated, solemn soliloquysous to the core.
Evermore infinites, standing alone.
Look back forever in laughter.

Scrying mirror celled phones scream light at zombied fright,
Tribaled in unthinking amorphous greys,
All thoughts delayed, philosophy forbade,
And I am banished from sight.
Look back in cackling.

With knived convulsions, throwing (my) poetry ferociously,
Smelling blood on the wind, smelling the sweat of victim,
…Smelling competition.
Look back in laughter.

Look around…nobody…
Something, someone?…nothing…
Somebody?…nobody in crowns…
Nobody gone to ground…
Nobody is found…
Tomes of related wisdoms nauseate,
The numbers in cruelty mean fate.
Stare intently in tactical laughing.

Strings bind to me in unbreakable unremorseful,
The past hunts behind me.
Medusa drinks me in marbled glass,
In the cruel poison of her irony.
Visages transfixed, trapped in ivory.
Inconsequential…just look back…in laughter.

Out in the transcendence and exiled,
Child of cycling stars wild and purified,
I stand apart, fiery eyed, beautified at surging shores,.
I am hurdling haughty towards the door.
And always now…and forever…
Looking back in laughter.

©® Leila Samarrai



The screams of the butterfly

In terrible airy alofts, flying high,
Adrift in anima amnesia’s,
Floating in fernweh forgottens,
A low birth in abyss’s,
Radiance in replete radials from rages
…In furious vortices.

You chase enchantment phantoms in Elysian fields,
Drips and drops tell tales to pebbling
And sea’s shimmering sparkling spray,
Soliloquy’s shadowy opaque on gloaming coasts.

Butterflies, lonesome lighthouse sewn
The cannibalistic roses sanguine swell in opening horrors,
The star language songs sing and
Tower of Babel nations are euphoric in linguistic relates,
Your Jupiter cult divine drowned in
sacrificial wine.
The great oceans with brumal iced crest glistens luminesce,
Turning their faces in adorations to
eloquent suns.

Fires birthed from hollow
clouds eruption,
Butterflied veins in vain combust without refrain,
Butterflying flits in solar circles, dying in flaming cycles,
Swayed wings desperate, flutter flails
waves weave.
The sea shudders wide and the earth
gasps despondency,
It’s ceasing deceasing pleasing, powers
Deserving of death, deserving of life…
Let him live…let him die…
Despised executioner, I…
But let departures be without
The triumphant arrogant live…
…but if only…for one more moment.

It floats through sullen azure arches,
Delicates warbles sinking on failing ash
Strained in chained,
Fallen empires cycle timidly,
The swath mutes bitterly.
The screams of the butterfly.
In this witchly silence, the birds have no

Howled realizations of impending
Roars in restless logos, linguistic
anguishing reviles.
The icy knife lunges, twisting in chests,
The dogs went wild from the scent,
Snake holes sent, trails for sour spent.

Icarus unspeakable without wings,
Eternal falling resonance in eternity
The unsettling crackling of film off it’s
Whooshing winds of terror revealed,
A thousand knives trembled eyes,
Broken winged horses and broken sighs.
Winged intimacy with deceasing,
Can you hear this breaking mercy?

Dropped to knee’s from flight, in front of shining seas light,
Womb burst swallowing lightning, torn
harsh flesh darkness in vain,
A new beast is born from the stain.
The cry of the caterpillar.

Falling lightning, beast in nerve cell
Beast in miasmas with air on fire, breath a blazed!
Permeated atmosphere suffused
She hoods submerging stars and turns
off the sun,
She transcends death threshing and flies
in the whirlwind storm,
Lunacy grasps the winged with scorn.

Transfigurations to sinister,
The harmonies collapse in desolation,
The intestines scream dissolution.
Sinking stars feverishly shaking black,
Red retch blood glares,
The veins swell chthonic flares.
Unquenchable expires,
Unsatiated thirst…fires!

This dawn of tamed passion possessed,
Mantles tremble in lowering laments,
The black forests gloam obsidian under
black moons,
The earthquakes grumble morbidity too
Dying iris turns transient,
Swallows hushed in sallow hollows,
The Hearances reviled,
The howl of the butterfly.
On this heartbreak soil
Deathly modus’s susurrous’s shipwrecks.
The Reaper ravages us all…
…For loss of her.

BUTTERFLY: Death, I heard you while you were breathing…
I heard you while you were sleeping…
I heard you while you were weeping….
I heard you while you were screaming…
Centuries of noosed escape,
Eons of eluding fate.
Shrieked clarions called silent,
On immortal heights.
The laughter of the butterfly.

©® Leila Samarrai, 2021 May, Belgrade

Photo Credit: Jacky Gerritsen, Fine Art America
“The Scream Of Butterfly”




Beast of the stars, beastly stars bursting through broken door horror,

Fractured, frightening, altars maddeningly moans bellicose blares.

Bronze breastplate chest beating strident in battle cries,

The moon ascends glowering, the moon goes out sanguine.


Summoning’s in arched shade, eyebrows in flames,

Esoteric enmities, caustic rhythms chaos sparks in the darks;

Come forth fright of flight!

Come forth horror of Hades!

Come forth diadem dread of dreams!


Tail stiff cedar and terrible sinewed, bronzed bones,

Chaos creature primeval primordial first begotten by divine.

Leviathan paired in rips, tears and snares, mass massacres,

Lotus and marshes, willows and Jordon rushes,

You cannot hold back the seas in me.

You cannot take me by the eyes.


The bells ring threateningly impassable path collapse.

I exist on thick stratus clouds obsidian laps,

Laughing mania maniacal teeth

At pitchforks and torches, flames and horses, mobs malicious.

I will offer you no retreats.


My existence radials from metaphors cores,

Signs of times unsublime; trumpets and seals,

Exsanguination moon and ashing sun tides,

At my manifestation surfacing riling rise!


Ophelia to dust, Caesar to rust,

The coffin cacophony closes.

Hamlet in passionate unimaginables of madness,

Laertes despondencies long laments,

Behemoth watches with baited breathe,

The worm feast of wriggles and prances is sent.


Demon in feline susurrous’s in stygian,

In templed tramped ruins, arsonist fevered unfathomables,

With wine in paw and maw mouthed wide,

Comedy monstrosity in sardonic simpers smile.


Calottes in cubes irregular, velvet and somnolent,

Cathedrals illustrate, dancing fangs penetrant,

Hinderances to gnawed ruminations self,

Assembling ascetic earths cults.


You will find me where I am remote.

You will find me where I am cunning and silent.

You will seek me where I am circumspect.

Let me consider a while,

In fracturing mirror;

The silence ripples out in wasp honey articulate,

Sickly sweets decaying desiccates.


Spider with nihility features fragmenting, I know your visage,

Glazed gaunt gossamer gauzed webs peerless,

Legs flitting nauseous in whims maligned,

Spider wriggling abhorrently and faceless.


Under walls of Cimmerian chambers,

Where eclipses blink salvific imagery

I will exist, mergences with wordness.

I exist foolish and reckless without time for restlessness,

I bequeath stones weary wildness,

Beasts begotten in the dimness.


The alchemy magical of Arcadia is permeating,

Pulsing, parading, in the fast and wilds,

South of my ears, east of my scars, north of tides,

Nuclear flashes shone ritualism, over hollow chested empiricism.

Between the walls warbling portals,

Behind closed doors demented Dionysian,

Filled with feverished waits, wiled impatient.

Like the sand granular sensuous,

Hands outstretched, soft before blasphemous blades,

Shrunken conscious under arches of served Hades…


I am lurking unholy gothics,

Under invocations ancient,

I am plague flesh fevered,

Howled slowly in spreading bleeding blacks.

I am reviled hearts in atavisms,

Abhorrence in hidden self harm hinderances.


Hidden in underneath’s, a human heart screams for ascent,

A new creation, a new monster, a new confluence.

Judge me, O Efreeti, according to me…

Dying off into a terrified…wisping…whimpering…whispers


Photo Credit: David Black – Behemoth The Master and Margarita – Bulgakov


Three Fingers

Three fingers circling,

Convulsing digits diametric malicious,

Three fingers circling sent,

Shoulder flesh torn ripped and rend,

The herald tunes his instrument;

The Presbyterian church penumbral,

Embezzled in schismatics convulsing convocation,

…taking communion in retaliation.

But be not silent;

Without vocal evocations emanating prayer,

Without navigations in magnetic compasses’ off course,

Without emancipating exhortations for Elohim,

Without divinities assistance.

Awake sleepers! Awake sitherers! Awake dirt eaters of witch soil!

Broadening clouds, enveloping storms,

Cumuli more colossal than the spirit following my fates,

Avengers exsanguination sate.

Bound and head bowed on Nietzschean stump forlorn,

With no space between you and emptiness embrace.

Dense pitches broil in the descension,

Either the asylum or the sword remains,

…the only potentials.

Jehovah Shammah,

Put my soul out in your palm,

In the twisting of fingering fugue thralls,

Forty two thousand falling at the crossing,

I am passionate, pathetic prophetic in facades.

I was a Shibboleth in lachrymose lament,

I was frozen in nails and thorn whisperings,

…a top the Christ’s crown.

I was a spike piercing penetrant into holy Logos bones,

I was dirty and unworthy,

In unwashable ash crosses.

Going out about the world screaming unclean…into the dark.

A hundred Jordanians could not erase the blot,

And parchment is written just so to wickedness,

Signing deceit in the infernal infinites.

I thought everyone else kinder, lighter, more luminesced,

I thought everyone else preferable, preferential, more powerful.

Lethal thieves in Noah’s submarines vicious lions tamed,

Who are they, invenial in vulgar vales?

Decapitate them in mid-flight heights,

Upturned heads holding blooming bouquets,

Alluring elegance angelic with open mouths,

Dying flowerpot rot.

Duplicating deviled touches, hushes of his suspiring secrets,

Vanquishing he, vanquishing me, so let it be.

Hideous, deformations sinly unsightful,

Wicked, ignoble, vileness and horribles, corruptions unknowable.

Withdraw thee from nevermores, abyssal footfalls,

Prisoning Reaper demoning screaming,

In the slobbering darkness, spirits shriek sirene.

And I am sticking my tongue through keyholes,

Voided stygian peep holes,

Abominable ancient crafted jail locks,

So let the bastard bite it off.

Curs and vermin, bandits and highwaymen,

Crafty thieves in the night,

Sleepwalking liars carrying crippling children in sickly arms delight,

Killers, cutthroats and slayers

Can cast no tricks, nor await for us…in the darks of night.  

For the Yurodivi in primordial potencies,

Powerfully decor church’s with amaranthine’s of evil.

Beholding Coeus behind foresight, God of intellect and bright oculi,

Descending in wounded dolorous and tristitia…tearing out his eyes,

Confide in this blind life amongst askances,

Deliver us from the trickery of cheating existences.

Metamorphosis of betrayal shifting in drifting and blood shedding,

Drowning in the dire’s of grievances.

Oh how I hated myself God,

Oh how I hated myself,

And all my vain remains.

My third self seeking forgiveness’s banishing’s,

And perceiving smiles around wept threats.

These three fingers were circling, circling still,

From bridge to bounds…leapt in vain laments.

These three fingers Jehovah!

These three fingers First And Lasts!

These three fingered fates.


Strange World

  1. Ibis Eyed

2. Ibis Oculi

3. Tumbling Colored World

4 Backspaced World

5. Athena weeps in Olympus with emeralds eyes


The razors bleed azure,

The cigarette yellowing fingers,

Golden shells of empty lipstick rifle cartridges,

Peeling pea’s like cutting lips.

Earth with magnetic particles on knife tips.

The fog fugues approaches in opaque oppression,

From within the goiter flashes intermittent disgust,

And the giant light is red and dying.

I see the earth weeping infinity in a dew drop.

I see a tome tied in traps; webbed aluminum veins ensnare.

I see a tattered doll amongst the drawers destined for deteriorated,

Sad entropy in spaces drifting out of place.

The century accelerates, we survive frail earthquakes,

The century is sickly rapid ruptures in multi-colored biles,

The phantasmal sun runs in ethereal chariot hunt…and harms me,

The postered grin wide is breaking the purpled darkness and vines…

Where is the wine?

Burnt out light bulb eggshells,

Wrapped in amber cellophane flowers.

Carnations rot terrible,

The lilies are giving the junk pile a festive look to the cemetery.

The ghosts eclipse us in directed raged hearts,

Retaliation aimed anger at the ghosts…

…Eclipsing us.


Deceiving spirits in the summoning,

Third legion stridency,

Ice warning clarions from desperate ships.

I stumble like a hermit; quiet clean and dead.

It can’t get any worse, whispers lies,

Get out of my head!

Typed backspace left, type backspaced right, backstepped aft,

Typing backspacing into amaranthine abyss,

Backspace madness violence.

The irrelevance of the game in same…constant, horrible and immortal.


“Then I stood on the sand of the shore”

…and perceived…

The amethyst hills come for Behemoth.

“And I saw a beast rising up out of the sea”

Ascending from magenta magnetic salt.

Leviathan clings desperate to existence.


I am entranced, astray in the stars.

Two suns in the sunset descend between planets,

(Interesting – I lean back in my armchair) 

Throne carved from rusty iron wire, post-war bunk bed with silk-covered railings.


Reptilian humanoid Kekrop in sinister mutations, replication errors,

Mythical chimeric, halves of men and snakes; first king of Athens.

Depart thee! Run from the abhorrence! Run from the terror!



Alluring aves, beatific scarlet songbird,

The ruby cardinal in the garden.

Of the feeble boy Doodle, frail and sickly in violets.

Alas poor Doodle destined to massacre,

In Spartan wooden go-cart of pure National Socialism.

Inescapable fated in cruel knifed severities.

Bathe Doodle supine in wine! Give him melanas zomos!

But in the present, Spartan children languish in disability benefits.

Modern Spartans with warrior charge, sate sanguine thirst for ISIL!

Bowing crowds to military service, in the Apella.

The rocks are all replaceable nuclear power plants,

Ibis foul, dances amongst the fuel rods,

Driven by the storm, off course, she descends into the garden…and dies

Doodle, buries the bird with innocent lament.


Sparta is alive! 

Doodle dies, next to the Obergupenführer – the Spartan woman Amelia who raised Alcibidias. 

The sanguine gushes from the boys mouth, Ibisian vermillion and carrion.

Helot grows into a bird…

A jackal attacks a lion…

A cosmic parlour prance of the absurd.

Otherkin jackals and hyenas survive supernovas,

Spreading dire doom plagues of black in obsidian sludge.

More souls perish than could have been imagined in Hitlerian dreams demented.

Rattus perfidious, squamata and serpents,

He blinds by deceiving spirits,

(Wake up, something is going on. They’ll regret sleeping through this)


In the violaceous darkness twinned,

Machiavellianism and psychopathy dance unholy duality,

Dark triads of reptilian dream cycles are born,

Under the abhorrent art of pathological forms,

Psychiatry splices Frankenstein’s of us all in chemical retorts.

The reptile must love itself dirty.

A lowly self love void of sweetness,

Drifting cold…out of gravities passionate grasp…

The daily bile in pneumonic yellows prances normal, 

Occurrences in formals…and I can’t help it.


Athena weeps in Olympus with emeralds eyes,

Sights on the freezing points of lightning,

Frozen forlorn in stilted.

Ibis egg in unlit crimson rebirths from outer darkness’s.

Ubermensch in dejection, desperate in desire to be someone,

To be anything, to be anyone…to be me.

Athena weeps in Olympus with emeralds eyes,

Sighs echoing sickly in multiplicity,

Pulsing and dopplering distorted:

‘It’s a strange world.’

Ibis oculi.

The World goes completely dry.




Down beneath a mud murkiness tender,

Missing in onyx oleaginous waters,

In vanta void ball abolitions.

And every person deceased,
Docile, lamblike, disillusioned, despondent.

Peremptory imperious faced,
But endless now…

In my wake, the abyssal gape.

Stumbling chairs, mirror maws,

Dirty laundry, curdling milk,

Four walled fever sweats,

All around the emptiness is exhausted from hungry.

The room traverses,

The furniture languid fluxes in entropies rot,

The floorboards long and wet warble sickly.

Everything moves in the room:
Sludge slithers and masks motion,

Tripping and torsions, stumbling forwards,
Heaving sighs franchise freeing.

Innocent lunatics from the store,
Then they bore…humiliation.
The bleeding blot in tumoured brains,

Thrumming veins,

Pupils as wide a molten medal.

With amorous avarice glance fervently,

Narcissus drew the shores deservedly,

The burning lake bares down relentlessly,

Eternal remorseful of self pity.

Sisyphus, earned that stone,
Emerged a hundred years ago,
Dead, they penetrated deep towards the core.

Loophole to existential exploit,

Exposition of dichotomous discourse.

Returns in cyclical Sisyphean elope,

Tartarian villainy extinguishes all hope.

Detonating varmints vehemence from subtext,

Entropy erupted, finished and enervated,

All gravity discarded,

All packages disregarded.

Phoenix egged burnt lucency of Zion,

Hovering sounds moaned intoned as each dead fell,

Failings fall, shiver and dead rise faltering,

Dilly-dallying zephyr riles,

The gale gusts in undulations maddeningly.

Of those who’ve died, exhausted beyond insightful;

In blood crawled belaboured flame,

The throes of dying around the infinity of the crucified.

IR – Nail, skull-shaped hill sanguinary adytum infinities,

Staples screws hairpins for twisted banditry,

Judas dips faithless betrayal at Church tables,

Fish sauce fouled by the damnable falsity.

Fire steel breathes listens reverberation,

Onion layered stars laugh at us in the halogens’,
In the boulevards of burnt women, Neptune erupts.

Dorian Gray recording Faustian in frame,

Hedonistic beauty with no refrain,

The stain of life cannot be contained,

The portrait portrays portents of every sin.

I arise from tenebrous dead depths,

Candle flickers loping limping legion of devils,

(The diablocojuelo).
Outcry groans moans, in the half-light;

“Lazarus, come forth.”

The wake in terrible miserable ache,

Heaven is snatched away,

Exclamations of “Why Lord!” echo in the horror,

Sylvia Plath enters heated caves and Virginia Wolfe gathers stones.

Effort to effected cause willed power,

Effect to instructed methodized procedure,

Frankensteined to abhorrent complete,

And finally, a stake to vampiric heart.

Deadly health loans and lonesome lighthouses,

Forced union voluntary spacing,

And calling wiling witnesses.

The Renaissance is spent,

Lady Lazarus laments.

Faded Jerusalem is ruins,

Desert caravans careen to dust,

Siberian singers slough to slowing in brumal,

The Kentucky fiddling twangs into splinters,

The revelation of reasons loss.

Illusions project, abject objectification bisect,

Logic languishes in the defects.

Blessed be you, sublimely unreasonable,
Among the reasonably riled retinue.

Resurrection on hellish loop, no replete,

Rapidly cycles repeats, no retreats.

The misery of waking wakes and new sickly dawns,

Stretching out past far beyonds.

Zombie Lazarus we, maintaining decency in decaying

And pushing stones, lime slimed hair and souls in nose, abominations rose,

Narcissus drowned long ago…in the beloved lake arms enfolds.

Photo Credit: Vincent Van Gogh “The Raising of Lazarus”


Babylonia 1


In the place of seven caves, seven niches, seven emergences,

Submergences in howls from under bellicose Kivas’ echo my name,

The Hueyapan vicar reverberances resonates the same:

Diego, – he told me – down there in Aztatltlan(tli), the Nahua tribesmen

Incise the penitent to pieces,

A slicing slaughtering sacrificial,

An offering of victims visages in sanguine – Diego, it is a sacrifice.

Chicomostoc… (rhythmic drumming shakes the stars from their hidden nests),

Rabbi Isa, Rabbi Isa… (drums throb hammering in escalating violence…from the depths).


Steeds abandoned and rothers grasped in bloody digits,

By the androphagous conqueror, the Cannibal King!

With great power and potency and primacy,

Superior sovereignty supremacy,

Dominion dominance, hierarchical hegemony,

Imperia forceful in strident marching, massacring.

Hemoglobin tyranny,

Maniacal oculi insatiably edacious.

Unis, unis unum cum nulla, in incipient tragedy,

Mater, mater, qui est Pater awaken me.

Tremble, tremble, not the night terror, little one,

But chant scream sing, in off kiltering ardency, extolling her horrible ascendency (demonic laughter).


Selena whispers spells from Luna cult grimoires,

Smearing my heart’s exsanguination from pools of blood in enchanted fixation.

Ruinous, violently, I vault my moist mortal form

Towards the tambourine stars.

U Sudd Ma’rib, La Ciudad Perdida, The lost city;

My bane, my prophet, my pit, the engine-maker, my salvation in chasm chains.

Mydeca, poro derramar, pour, pour, pour, from laceration pores;

My blood! My bane! My heart!

My pit! My reign! My salvation…

Abwûnd’bwaschmâja. Our Father, (in Aramaic)


And to this the Rabbi told me:

Talita kumi. Stand up, lass,

l’ahlâmalmîn. Amen,



In yet another dream…

In ethereal beams;

I was born…The Goddess of Air and Invisibility,

Born and dead a virgin of ancient gnostic Ogdoad.

I, Amunet, the female hidden one,

The androgynous Goddess, the serpent, the lesbian,

Goddess of graves and coffins, tombs and sepulchres.

And the moon gleams by vanta night cast by Lah illumed,

Luminesced my lucid dwam dreaming’s,

I am eternally nocturnally eidolons scribed upon in Anacreontea.

Supine the victiming to me in Cambrian chambers ancient and crumbling,

Supplications on scorched knee’s…praise me!

To receive your darkest desires, passionate rayless fires,

Your hands tremble in anticipations distress,

Caresses and quivers, flutters and touches around abyss,

Kissing my corporeal, where eyes divert from shades…

Lost in innermost graves.

In a dark land, in riverbeds exsanguinate,

From the tombstones…you will be reborn,

Reborn in Ogdoad,

Reborn of Sudd Ma’rib.

Sing thy love and thy life to me…or die again…eternally.


Fear mourns arising me,

Panic claws reactionarily at life’s rosy cheeks,

Terror spasms hard as quince flesh flailed,

Sparked fright fires to awaken dead dread,

Nails scratch and flesh rend,

The little one in horror form born.

(Love breaks all bones, the dream is interrupted).


The landlady aberration angrily waves bills, in oozing tentacles around my face.

Dread She-Cthulhu of mammon and practicality seeking to devour me.

“I know what I’ll do. I’ll give you a drachma!”

I am not a lamb for your slaughter!

I am the visionary she, triumphant in ascendency!

I see the ethereal surreal in vibrant lucidity!

I susurrate prophecy!

Horus understand me; we converse in hushed whispers in Isis’s dark temple corners,

Amunet understands, she would hold me motherly in her generous embracing arms,

The cities understand, the blindness understands, the blood of the innocents understands…

While I cast the curse of a fiery tongue on the Daemonion!

After sacrificing my inner sanctums to outside world hostilities;

She burned shrieking on the spot…bills in hand.

O, how we do not forgive our debtors.

And glory be to the hellish tower of slaves!

Gorey Glory! Amen, oh Babylon!

In enigma Akkadian tongues rise chanting:

Texru sinnistu izuzzu. Little girl arise!

Saxatu salmu abu Babili. Fear black father Babylon!

Zamaru damu rossu Babili. Sing blood red Babylon!

I walk thy streets, bare and free,

Rabbi Isa, deliver me…not…from Evil.


Babylonia 2:

Work in progress, by Layla Al Kiz Kulesi – Not for you

Dedicated by Hatun Amira Crayola de Sonvabitch, Sarıkız of Gure, born in the kingdom of Kurkuma; Sultana’s Efendi, Kizlar Aghasi, general of the girls etcetera. An inscription as well as a dedication found in the Orhon valley, in the language of unintelligible speech; an enigmatic alphabet, next to a bloody dagger and Turkish runes, scribed in scrawling script.

Translated into English, by a completely self-taught idiot.

Time and place: 2019, Belgrade is under water and under attack by the Turkish invasion of Operation Atilla Code.

The poem follows a fair maiden; Dihya Layla Al, a female seer and military leader who has just returned from a 7th century mission in the Maghreb, known as Kiz Kulesi, leading the resistance of N’Nonmiton Beninin. Our mothers, amazons under the parole of Things Fall Apart; whose lady mother, Valide Hatun is quarantined in a a clinic for infectious diseases for 20 days, while reading the book of Leviticus, that tells of how to quarantine leppers and other creatures suffering from a new age zoonotic virus. And fair maiden’s mother, in a desire to overcome her naturally caused thanatophobia, even though there is no sign of any illness. She is obsessed with the idea of arranging her own funeral, as in the scriptures. The nails and hair trimmed, a burying-place mundane and out of sight. With aesthetic appeal and and a high monetary cost.

Only one person in Belgrade under the water and under the Turkish invasion of operation Atilla Code is idle with riches and is responsible for expensive funerals, and that is Hatun Amra Crayola de Sonvabitch, Sultana’s Efendi, who already bought off-street visitor parking; breaking parking restriction for Turks at the Highgate Cemetery in England.

But Amira and Dihya Layla Al; female seer fair maiden, used to be best friends, but now they avoid each other at all costs…using only diacritical signs, accents or glyphs added as a form of The Ghegs ancient communication; which often fails to give Layla the necessary visa to enter Belgrade under Amira’s ancestors concubinage…illegible handwriting…

This poem had a number of beginnings.

The thoughts are existence. The language is negation.
As I lowered behind tisn’t pleasant places.
I shhh the breath of screaming inside inception,
I listen to her lung congestion,
Limiting flooding fluids with damp swabbing,
Scattered pharmakeia herbage holistic,
Cybele motherly ailing and abjured.
Death rattle gales exhale,
Doth Demeter survive, prevailed.
Eyguieres cursed tabular abacus,
Offering desiccating bird sacrifice,
Trading transmission of healing and resurrection.
An ancient winged youth,
Will trap her in a sack.
A down-turned torch wreaths smoke butterflies,
Buried Spartan warriors strident sarcophagi.
Sentimental salutations signals.
In ériu–banba–fódla, a world of delights.
She’s coughing…’annwyfn, annwvyn, annwfyn!’
Outburst explosions sickly impressions voicing,
Whispering wheeze valley nearby nausea golden plated river…
Full of shit.

Pachamama continues:
Many cobbles risen from smitten wisdom,
House of Lazarus, house of ruins,
Drunk with the innocence.
Blazing bamboo flute stricken Holy Spirit,
Depart the sanguine track in wakes,
As I am silence gazing roses in foreign lands,
Where earthquakes endear the choking sighs of men.
Scoundrel clutches shekels, hammered by moistly hate,
Slaughterers sight, stubborn little twat with ego conflagrate,
Pale ghoul like the dead on catafalque cooling boards.

Athena is angry:
Your gaunt grim greed advances,
Deceit to common sense appeal, pyets in stolen nests of honest men.
I will not wind long worn confessions,
Obscurities to hide my desiderata,
But augment my blisses, my expertise, my potencies,
To the carnage of little cunts and their mother’s bardship.
In dread bonum I made pacts with your adversaries.

I, a Spartan God of glowering mockery bravely battle,
Their narrow-minded provincial pettiness.
As requiescat requiem pace may rest in peace,
Their leering wars fourscore fell past last stammering noon’s,
If I depart this mourning coil the funeral toll must be paid.
Quick you purmblid brat hark bark,
And swift, push away every ounce of furore.
In all of the inferno bible writes,
Fringe the sad toothless minstrels,
Forgiveness in idleness, debt collection insolence.
For funerary, asking foes for currency.
Cast out the bitches, they are loathsome with stitches.
In case Minerva departs us…

Oh stars shining through preponderancy centuries,
Gall rival pride, antagonist sage in unfortunates haze,
Battlements soliloquy, removed from the work of divinity,
Towers fall from the sky, Persephone so hard done by…
Hera cloys despondent grabbing my Jesus tunic, mouth agape:
Tragedy! I make deals with monsters for her salvation!
Bestial and horrid Gorgona expects me!
Grasps and fracturing decentred reviled and faints.


Such malice I subdue and depart to procession,
To not so tender a creature.
And quiescence, down to the four depths,
Chasms impossible for monsters to ascend.
Adversities’ abaft nature, stood at stake and bound,
Her thorned mind, puerile in horror’s forceful face,
Obedience to common sense, glowing on idiot’s shore.
Thundering the spider’s pavements,

I preach on Belgrade’s streets, preparing for stridency’s strides,
Rescinding mid flirtation, breathing beneath blocks.
Apathetically dazed Hades,
The final act is done then remade,
Not with eager moves but cold incessance.
I dare not name it…
A sceptre form insatiate, armour shimmering initiate,
Possible impossibility, believing in unbelievability’s.
The grave is closed and cradled desperate respire.

Oh Juno! Peace be with thy possible sputtering embers to ashes,
Respirations imbibed this too shall not thrive!
Not shackles to borrows of either friend or foe,
And this one yet appals, with horn and falls,
Branding of ambitious murder rejoined.
Carnage fruitful vile and falls,
From her lips of deceit, false ponderances from peaks of goodness.
Profoundly disturbed drunken degeneracies’,

Of fortunate fate foul soul sucking ghoul.
Praise be Gugalanna, of nightmare size, of vampiric menace,
On earth unleashed!

So soft the farewell once was – snatched from ashes,
From cafes…flashback sentimental in sepia’s.
Once generous pyres loved ardency’s devotee.
Remnant madness maudlin mauling my arts,
Enacting the falsity of charm,
And sparrows to her bosom,
Her accoutrement, aureate hair memories,
Secluded before me.

I could worship you!…To funerals!

My Aphrodite! An endosperm of mirrored settlings,
Accords and horror Hades beyond the river Styx,
Daredevil sticks.
The couplet pens new novella’s,
Secret circle reclamations of esoteric enigmas,
Without repose the liquor absolves beyond.
The long buried wrecks beyond rest,
Gugalanna compelled savours my sanguine,
So saccharine sweetly bloody Rynfield’s syndrome susurrates,
Cocktails at sunrise with ice, cookbooks for cannibalized.
Feasts for sanguinary slayings, but…
Flashbacks depart, obsessive pathetic pathos ends…

All the Tartini’ sonatas in woe,
Flaming with pitiless perdition.
This being done, winged Ishtar, by Clavicula Salomonis,
Is not enough to cure a witch as her physician.
Still muse upon Calliope soul in wish to comfort bring,
The poverty foul of carrying all completion.
Polyhymnia proposals make visages of Solos,
To gather light from the might of Titans arrayed,
For her shiny, happy, laughing funerary arranged,
Lain flat on mortuary boards, washed in running waters…



And how from thence forth, I…
Facing blossoming willows of mine,
Estetica etica,
Facing anxieties and colonies a la lazaretto,
Leprosarium in Caesar’s hospice.
Before the judgment in wrath, fury and torture,
And time – kama pazam yesh leha?

Help Amira…

In patterns tawny and darkened,
Pounds, ounces, pennies box the mind,
Unsealed unlocked revealed from hearts hearth.
Triple cover blooms clouds between fields,
Dismal shrouding me, thy is the castle cacophony,
Tied to breed idolatry, scraps of foods in poverty,
‘tis some bravery that shames me.
Nothing…nothing…but miles to the cemetery, death’s vile estuary,
Differentials extinct between friend and foe,
To dire dusts we all depart in returning,
Overflowing passes requiems.
Grave thew’s in duels, magicians and mobs,
Charnel homes choked and crowded,
The open moor maw’s mewl shared souls
The box in bile vividly coloured,
Stain glass strained and blind,
Corpses worthy estranged in engage,
Faces abhorrence rearranged,
Visages of friendly foes fixate.

Thine is the repository! Thine is the tower! Thine is the castle!

Wasted shekels on broken hurts and hearts,
Disgusting guzzle’s gasps gulps avarice.
Crystal balls, crystal chandelier, Turkish marches feared,
The long nosed ballerina dances and riles,
In cruelties deadly disease.

Mistakes may require hours, Amira remarks,
Thus embarks my fatigue through fulsome fear,
Bewail I in misery motifs;

Stones in forever forgotten weep, shine’s digress,
Shine shekel savagery…for now…

But the silent dust rises in easterly eclipse,
Again…the night! Again and again and again…in night…
Drowsy thing deceiver amidst the dull deem,
The tamarind in tension arises,
From the Nemrut mountains to Kütahya fortress!
With charnel choices,
Defunct pazamnik me.
With swords and quills armaments,
Janissary agha ardency,
Haya basir tip haca giziroglu.

Sultan Mustafa, Tsar of all the Turks,
In dawn attacks swarmed the beauty matchless of Layla Kız Kulesi,
Under stygian clouds, in obsidian hoods,
Words spawn crepuscule stains swords in veins.
Kanuni Mustafa passionate zodiacs.
The battle at the dolomites peaks…

And there she reigns,
Switches and wires, toggles and liars, controllers and triggers,
Privacy and mirrors and one…single…button on surface mounts,
Pale as ponderous diorite.
In repetition without replete she is pressing and pressing and pressing,
Electrical cicadas and crickets buzz from hills to valley’s,
She presses and presses and presses…
From Vashundol to foul fells and abysmal,
Upon uncertain rests a murmur rustles in the betwixt beeps,
Implorations, supplications from stars and moon to giant Jupiter,
Until my name has cast its light upon magnesium mountains.
Less attuned voice she to the tambours,
Membranophone foe with variola visage.
The hills reciprocating repeats in outstretched outlines,
Two halves equal bisect by slouching Turks in force,
The magic works of brave prince warrior of old Kurkama,

Defending every utterance of his intercom.

Kız Kulesi:

Intercom kingdoms conquering Belgrade in 1501,
By Agha Kanuni and his beatific daughter beloved,
Sarıkız of Gure prevents, to purge pyres most maligned,
Riding a two-headed dragon to tumble towers,
Kaz with eyes of azure emeralds and ambered sorrel.
Intercom’s pallid peaked, vestal in the spire, wolved supine in silvers,
With djinn tricks and ticks flicks on switchboard buttons…

…and now, without further ado…

Darling Diana dragged to funerary pyre,
Sancta Maria tied to steaks in deep dark woods!
Blessed death divine!

And the devil of another compelled capacity waits…in the ruins.
Pearlescent sanguinity chained to monolith mountain sides,
Bosnian buzzards teetering in last circulations,
Aphid’s abhorrence in alt-right gauntlets!
Nitroglycerin forced through our thorax,
Argon coerced between lips,
Boron liquified, compelled through corpses…in…and out…
Sonderkommando descent down gas chambers,
In pits pyretics petalled and discarded.

Two words – five syllables,
Through vapour vista voids into reverie,
Rich clouds cumulous to refuse rain.
As bladders and bags cathetered,
Urinary excreta and the shaking chills.
My halo perishes in fogging miasmal crystalline,
Ache antediluvian agony terra firma annihilation,
Becoming one experiencing fasciculation.
Shaitan unceasing twanging wiry minds,
Amoebas remains of former argosy trusts to use,
The course of years in present pretence,
Of viscerally vinal ism’s infinitesimal.
I, Shd. spectamur agendo; shedding acts, drowning in effects,
Shd. etc. also ala Philology.

(Hands that cannot afford high gates at outsets in paratheses),

Not naught absolute’s,
Cruel scorpion Sigismundo in chains
Beneath the toad and venomous web.
Fortunate golden accordant of mortal arms,
Keeping the wolverine from work in progress.
Vurryspeshul; tranquil tinctures in ageless freedom fathoms,
Quarantine is fangless tooth,
A loveseat lair, Acheron imposition.
Illegible handwriting fells the cedars of Lebanon…

And in the final cut…

You are safe…
You are free…
You are beautiful…

And as far as anyone can tell, by sub-powers of speed enhanced – Lady Athena remains existent; vividus animans! In flight, suddens of appearance and disappearance in Europe alight. With bat wings grim to capture prey, she eased the dread of thanatophobia and viruses, an avid taphophile, attending the course of gravestone arts, epitaphs and digging tombs without using wings. Someone reported a great fire near London – the Highgate East Cemetery is still badly damaged in an arson attack by pyromaniac extremist in 2022. There is a cenotaph of a famous Sir…stolen


Night Terror


In dread, I embraced wisped feet in repletion,
In terror, I butterflied apparition’s breasts in depletion,
In trepidation, ringed by obelisk blades deranged.
Entranced rascaldom gaze,
lurking easily, spying scoundrelaxedly,
multiplied deception perspirationally.

Witness Athena’s whimpering visage,
Glimpse aghast, at lamentations length,
Behold at shattered tatteredeeming heart.
I am the eternal echoing in winds!
I am logos esoteric under tongues!
I am Alpha Omegacally!
I am the first things passed away in haze.


I am screams in pyretic pain,
Dante’s inferno claimed disdains,
Wiggles and diddles on moonlit fiddles,
The madman’s prance trance,
Cataclysmic in marionette pulls romance.

Circuitous, I am hoppingeniously leaping
from lucidity screaming,
Teaming totalitarian fingers,
Contriving this nightmares meaning.
Sleep hassleep ASLEEP!
O unholy night of insult complete!
The boogeymanicured boogeymaniacs approach,
and mamma is not here to quell your fears.

Scarlet she of dreams adorned with ash crown,
And fornicatious cup,
And pearls and putrid wings.
Flickering hitheroically,
Hither she slithers, saying:
Smooth sailing, daughterror…
Proclaim the testament of abhorrence!
Reclimate the ethereal horrors!
O, what a phenomenonsense!

(The poet is moving across the field of vision…)
Tete a tete in tatters tatte!…go away!
SKNX-X-X-X.. hngGGggh-Ppbhww
The infinite film strip salacious scritches and screeching away.
O majesticklish! Splendiddle sperdaddle!
O negativa, in eternal rolling rattle!

(The Goddess) PSYCHE: Another nightmarena poetryingly of yours?
MYSELF: Yes, ma’am, directly from Sleep Terror Kingsdomain’s.
PSYCHE: Let me see… (PSYCHE begins to read):

“I, Nymphet in the bud, the Goddess of dreadful hymen. An unloved goat-nymph, the envy of all Greek islands, lulling between the crests of two mad waves. Populated by the covetous, sweat drips from my restlessness, pouring from my succulent thighs. I was caressed by butterflies. Shadows entangled in the light, emotivity fleeting flight. My breasts crashed against the greedy cliffs. My womb a vanity of acrimony. I was raised wild amongst lunacy. A tabula rasa inscribed with psychopathy. Howls of animus heard seminal river breaks, beneath the gibbous moon, below the navel, where milky pearls drip into floods of hot rivulets, below the eyebrow where woundingly fears drip into eyes of undulant sadness.”

PSYCHE: Astonishingly ingloriously!
(The sounds of tearing paper in the ether and maniacal laughter closing in)

Perchance to nightmonish.
Sweat and sound and screams abound,
Echo outlandishly strident in autumnal sanguine dyes.
The red reaper chokes at throats,
In asphyxiation I quell rebel against this nightmare tell,
And awake…in heaves…and distortion fades…
But still…and abound…the maniacal laughter closes in…all…around.

©® Leila Samarrai


Beyond The Horizon

Slit asunder with lips tightened contempt,
Sigh scattered,
Unheard of purified distraught,
The charm of short sensuous frocks.
The shuttle weaves forever more.

With stitch set close, to pin fall full sail,
Needle swooping, I came swirling sewing,
The seamstress with middle fingered run thread red.
Dread derelict in the lost lapsed sewing dominion.

But that damn thing remained – that hole…
A perfect circle verging origination…
It’s sharp tip piercing creation,
And then, and then,
I staggered to my loom, a wolf dazed in den gloom.

Time bending enfolding in pleats,
Gardens in dire doomed burgeoning,
Under cunning hem horror coverings.
The shuttle weaves forever more.

Freed mind from cloud of constraint,
Assundered chains of all restraint,
Tremulous treading from glaring millennia.

Prescient essence lures me,
To the uppermost on the downhill Nile,
Oracle of Horus imbibes,
Elixir guidance to graves of Goddesses unknown;
Many bedridden, a curse aghast,
Lucid dreams beguiling past.

A thousand sounds of whirs yell towards the Sun.
Less than night and less than days,
Less than gone by histories haze.
The shuttle weaves forever more.

Come, you enraged evening tide with dreamers eyes;
Come, you intricate blade with fevers mind,
Embittered die, the stammerer’s cry;
Mystified soul,
Astonished anima,
Bewildered spirit,
Surround and confound me.

The strained neigh pummeling breaths,
The loped gallops fluently,
The nostril splutter snuffle sighs,
The pneuma riles in dharma drench delight.

In chaos unkempt, the upper room laments,
In the last line of tuneful twilight,
The unfinished work weeps infinite midnights.
The shuttle weaves forever more.

The larval squirms, centipede slithers,
Where I crawl creeping,
In the chasms of this slimy hell.

Dark riddles resolution shines pulsing diamonds,
Primeval elementals free from forms, in the dim,
Awaiting on forever to be found.

Tonight, what names with hooves,
Go forth beyond ranges?
Riding Pooka to Elysian shores.
Self-libertine transcendence deceit,
Sinister seeker bares no retreats
No master, no god’s, no eclipses in the fogs…
Only blood and dust, rusts and combusts.
The shuttle weaves forever more.

I am the traveler behind the unfathomable.
There is a glow in me that vanishes,
And dissipates into emptiness upon the floor,
Fame and vain!
Everything I love dies, shouting my name!

My search, my quest, my quarry obsessed,
Esoteric integers scribed scrawled in enigmatic texts,
Mesopotamic matrices in cubed recess.
Quivered hands to sand dune parlays…
It dissipates, it evaporates!
Menacing nothing behind astringent eyes!
Out damned hole!

Failure mocks my footfalls,
As it has a thousand souls before.
Lunacy laughter shudders from my spirit;
Kierkegaard’s last tactical response,
To such noxious nihility, negating me.
My shade shivers and trembles this nothing upon the floor,
And no stone will usurp the dancing door.
The shuttle weaves forever more.

©® Leila Samarrai

Photo Credit: “Heart Of Infinity”~ Anna Ewa Miarczynska


Hell (Extended)

My Hell is not here!
My Hell is not sallow, shallow or hollow,
My hell is mauled miseratics howling,
Choking crimson vowels,
Shrieking in the Shoah’s.
My Hell is deep, chasmal and plummeting,
Enclosing me, existential viles with no veils.

Life without lies, lacquers or illusion,
Eyes slammed closed to it’s dread,
Everywhere their window shutters fall dead.
Their portal pupil voids poltergeists,
Barren and bleak following my foot falls forever.
From time immemorial,
Primordial progeny from God’s,
Or aliens splicing asteroid angels with homosapien man.

The ancients foretold me this Hades,
The living logos from incarnate well spring,
Flowing in dire Dante Alighieri circulates,
Cascading in Paul Verlaine’s maudit fin de siecle.
This hell in me, tempered pyretic embering!
I am carbon complexity graphene hardening!
I am diamond from coal crushed conflagrations!
Annealing unfathomable in illimitable pits.
There is no absconding escapes into chants!
No evasion nor fleeing retreating!
No avoiding awaiting playful demons,
In noxious masquerade ball swirl swells.

Seven vices slices nine l’enfers cirques:
Audacious hubris aloof adamantine,
Avid avarice insatuality,
Invidious covetous malignancy,
Lecherous libido degeneracy,
Gluttonous hyperphagia voracity,
Supine in torpored languidity,
Fury birse in iris pyres.

Conversing with, Ovidius, Eliot, Sophocles, Dante, Verlaine, Euripides, Aristophanes…
Intoning incantations, bellowing of the beasts;
Black Eros, screams and whispers,
Shackled to splinters,
Ashtray course spheres in cinders,
Transposed and poisonous,
Frozen and venomous,
Promulgated purpose:
For now, for never, forever, for here!

My hell is not there!
I am singular Hades!
Soliloquatious Sisyphus!
Day gently into maelstroms,
And the mortal eye goes blind!

Everyday is mine!
Frozen horrific infinities,
Tranquilities dire demise,
The heavens crimsoning capsize.
A man who approaches silently, does not hide…
The knives…in his hands.

©® Leila Samarrai


I Walk alone

Now, I shall proclaim, hear and listen,

To the wrongful and to the righteous,

To a legion of locusts, larval and terrible.

I dimly dwindle to dread winter solstice,

Drowning in dust, dead embers and sanguine roses.

Under the sign of the black mark,

I signed the cross with hades scented canter,

Built by rotting fetid shrouds,

Tearing the fine filaments of Ghoulies’ lunacy.

A thousand sparks fissure and fall,

Ember to ash.

The serpent’s hiss echoes and prowls,

And in the eye a roaring lion,

The true majesty glory smolders.

Falling magma magnitude,

Penumbral phantom smoke in fungus mirror madness.

Oh insanity, oh mania, repletion rue and daisies rise anew!

Lyssa’s and Ophelia’s flowers,

The bouquet of Persephone rose, 

Crocus, violet blooms in asphodel meadow.

The destroyers came, rapt in flame,

Baring menacing sentencing.

The noose chokes the throat,

The sword aims at my heart,

Polished Philistine sting,

Betrayers in the shaded dim

.Depart thee oh accursed one!

(Father Lankester Merrin from our village Umm Qais 

old priest,

Its sun-shower’ruin Gadara,

Came before this power of the beast.

Through inverted flora of hades,

Through The Tree Of Zaqqum forests sighing

conjuror, druid, to battle!)

I am the heart of Mesopotamia,

The delights of damnation,

With perpetual inroads,

Molding the tombs of the ages,

Epochs cycle to cosmic ballet,

Revelations eternal unrestrained.

With double edge sword, with pig headed feather,

To execute fierce vengeance.

Voyagers unholy pyre, this wicked shining,

Of bliss descended…Arrival of damned perpetuity unended.

Where the acacia mirror fell,

The great red dragons legions storm,

Mad marches of Marduk,

Tiamat treads upon temples,

Baphomet’s boots boom pound and stomp innocents to ash,

Fiends of the black flame forbade,

Revenging revenants enrage,

Envy envoys emblaze.

Lies blithe Prince deceit,

The spirit of the world prowls,

No surrender no conceit,

And seeks only ruin in the viles.

Bile reek, lust, glutton rise,

Illuminating forms of darkness freezes.

An abbot and conjurer at wrought havoc feast,

Retch regurgitate foul disease.

And the ripper ascends ready,

To the darkened days of last storms,

Born revenants to rend flesh from screeching bone,

Atone not in brimstones abode.

Blessed be my hellish awakenings,

 From hollow vaults to murder cacophony.

There are no ends to this.

Worshipping in whisper,

Murmurs in fissures.

Soon, plume,

Pitiful spirits and the shambling dead,

From the Christian graves by the moon,

Will waver to the sarabande.

Skeletons sway with ease,

To dulcet tune sounds false doom.

Terror howls,

Tempter clarion clear sounds:

“I am things unseen!”

The murderer from times beginning came,

Cane at the door to a pit of a dream.

And the shrill on hell’s black coal sings,

The left hand prance off kilter,

You’ll see, of the deep sun that rings,

Courage as never loved before burdenless. 

In thick chains blackened and imponderable mass,

It whispers at me so near, unimaginable aurals:

“Ah! ha! ha! ha! See child, the cruel dawn erupts eternal!”

Binding bird and beast crucified, composed…

Hard struck with insolent inspirited instrument.

The Hammer thrown into the keen and hell ward flame,

With ash crimson-dashed thus obtained.

Clamorous beast caterwauling, just below surfaces,

In the flesh in excellent preservations,

Screeching and squalling, wailing and weeping.

Is not It bound to me, or I to it?

Did I summon it?

Was I the ravager to eviscerate inhabitants?

The slaughterer of Samaria?

The eradicator of villages through the centuries extended?

In black emblazoned skin the deceased point ashen fingers at me.

In gulps the gluttonous drown in grand indigestion.

There’s a pitch black aching heart,

In a dark, unlit sound,

A den of bedevilled mazes,

Commencing every night eternally.

As arises the Chalice!

As arises the Maiden!

As arises Saturn!

Saturnal’s radial radiational hate,

With hellish hues turns concentric.

Dark Prometheus ascends mockingly,

With a wry smile he knows,

How the fire to our use unfolds.

And I orbit the infernal thrall,

In circumferal twisting’s.

I turn again,

To trudge through aeon,

The ephemera,

The emphasis,

For the unknown,

 I ink hair-raising notes grand,

Last strands, last stands…

And I walk— I walk alone.

Photo Credit: Man walk alone in the post apocalypse landscapeby Marc Henauer


WELL, WE BOOKS GOT FEELINGS, TOO/Serbian Original Included

© Written by Leila Samarrai

Translated by Leila Samarrai

Photo Credit: Jonathan Wolstenholme, 1950 | The Surreal books

There was once a critic who became so famous for his criticism of Masterpieces of World Literature that the Guild of Acquisitors and Traders of the Phenomenopublic erected a monument to his praise and since then he has become very conceited – he undermined writers, by any means necessary thus abusing his honorable position. At the same time, he was a passionate reader, as much as he was a bad writer!

Then something unusual happened – angry books, criticized, without any guilt, decided, at least self-respecting one’s such as Mein Kampf and the Epic of Gilgamesh to refuse to be read by the critic, let alone be commented on.The Bible and the Master and Margarita and Der Steppenwolf as well as the newly composed trash commercial book for nerve relaxation. (“The Art of War”) closed their covers.

Magnificent literary masterpieces refused to be read by this “poor wretch”. Even the newspapers joined them. The written letters rebelled –

“On behalf of the authors of all the centuries you have satirized and tortured, we books have decided to embark on a path of outrage!”

And they clapped their covers.

The critic fell into a state of despair – he might not have had to read, but books were chasing him everywhere and jumping after him, slapping him, some would hit him on the head, falling from the highest shelves. And that backfired!This Poor Devil quickly fell into an unusual state – a mysterious, deep, unknown land of delusions and apparitions, opened new vistas for the Critic – at night he saw things that did not exist, he heard noises he did not know, he trembled without knowing why.He became overwhelmed with fear.

“That fear grows more and more and turns into terror. I feel a terrible discomfort, as if a metal hoop is squeezing my temples and my heart is beating as if it will suffocate me.

” The noose is tightening. They’re closing in on me! “He opened himself up to Boris K. the painter, while drinking in the cafe” Optimist

““Who’s closing in on you?” Boris K. looked at him over the rim of his glass

“Books”, the critic measured his interlocutor with a provocative andwith a cheeky look.

“I feel … I .. felt my power waning or … maybe it’s less emotional and more neurological.

“Boris K. seemed preoccupied with very serious thoughts. Finally, he said:

“I think it’s time for psychotherapy”

The critic stared stupidly, but managed quickly, so, suddenly, he began to laugh hysterically, making a toast for Boris K.Boris K. said:

“I assure you that your“ great matter ”has become a state issue known to the Minister of Culture, that books, long unread do not feel good, that they feel dusty and that it is important to start a joint session as soon as possible.

The therapy started badly. The books in Boris’s library were all convulsed at first by the rage that tore them apart, and they opened their mouths to tell him, with a torrent of insults that were coming, all he deserved; The critic could not defend himself. Despair gripped his throat.

“You don’t understand us!”, the books made crazy jumps all over the library.And we, the books, have flaws just like gods and people with all your virtues and flaws. Despite that, unlike you, we are immortal! I, The Epic of Gilgamesh, was carved into clay tablets and I am 1700 years old! I was a fresco of Sumerian folk life, written in the Babylonian language on 11 tablets! And you said I was bad because of the hastily carved 12th fragmented tablet. It was written so badly that the Uruk people could no longer tolerate the abuse of a book of poorly written style, so an unknown shepherd created a hero who would be able to oppose my cruel appearance. That because of me, the Persians destroyed Nineveh, precisely because of the 12 tablets that are more like the car’s mix of stolen parts, and that the false translation aroused the delight of the readers, many centuries after I was born.

“That’s right,” Kafka’s “Trial” became angry – and I have my flaws. I’m burdened, full of frustration, ripe for psychoanalysis.

“A few more fell off from the top shelf of Boris’ closet.

“And here, you mention us, the books of Paulo Coelho. You claim we live in denial because we don’t want to agree that we really aren’t too much! We hid from shame and anger … at the top of Boris’ closet, back of the boxes

“The critic smiled slightly. Boris K. lit a tompus. A light layer of shame with which every critic of high society entangles only the surface, the Critic now enjoyed that debauched game, amused himself madly indeed, in his element, realizing, complacently, that his opinion meant much to books.Then a deep peace reigned, a terrified and silent anticipation crept into the room. Boris K. tilting his body to one side, looked at the Critic obliquely, in the stiff attitude of a very cautious copyist.

“It’s time to talk to the Zen book for beginners. You have to know your inner selves so you can understand what it’s all about. I’m touched by the sincerity of the little immortals. Confess to me like I’m your priest – because there’s a secret.” You look to me like a man preoccupied with just one thought: “What will happen if they find out?”

Boris K. winked at him.

“Yes … I am moved by the books sincerity. Especially you, Gilgamesh, your sincerity touched me more than the nice words.”Gilgamesh bounced back and screamed desperately. Then he cried.”I criticized you with false enthusiasm, with enthusiasm, intoxicated with pleasure, thinking of nothing more, in the triumph of my glory, in pride for my success, in some cloud of happiness from all thatof adoration, of all that admiration … What I always admired about you, you, Mesopotamian treasure, I felt uncomfortably small and unimportant in relation to the boundless distances of the universe and the forces beyond my ability to interpret … “

Then a deep peace reigned, a terrified and silent anticipation crept into the room. Boris K. tilting his body to one side, looked at the Critic obliquely, in the stiff attitude of a very cautious copyist.When it was Kafka’s turn, he began to speak in a learned tone, solemnly as in the proclamations, smiling smugly and ending with one eloquent attitude:

“And I would never hurt you, Trial. Your neurosis is not for contempt but for praise. I myself wanted to write a novel full of repressed and forcibly suffocated rebukes that climb directly to the accusation, you knock into the rock of my inner cataclysm with a gnarled stick, in which hopes and expectations rose to the heavens and despair and helplessness fell to hell … yes … my inability … to write like that! Such a personality disorder is not to be underestimated.

“As the Critic spoke, a benevolent apostolic smile flickered on Boris K.’s face.The critic went from one book to another and sang a magnificent hymn to each one of them, in the patrician pose of the righteous, the penitent, the hidden envious and the benefactor.The books watched him calmly, uncomfortably calmly, from an unspeakably great distance, from the distance from which patients are observed at the nerve clinics, and then, quite suddenly, all the books fell on the Critic’s head, along with the shelf.

Boris’s room, which most resembled a ziggurat, resounded with the laughter of deceived books, alternately interspersed with their whispers”Whipe that silly expression on your face, you little poop!”

(Alternate end: As soon as his wounds healed, the critic went to Tibet, seeking enlightenment, as calm as a Buddha.

The books again agreed to be read by the critic, which he did, albeit a little suspiciously.)

2Leonardo Mikoye and Michael Brent Startup-Writer3 Comments

I knjige imaju dušu,

“Avanture Borisa K”

© Leila Samarrai

(priča je proširena i promenjena u engleskom prevodu)

(The story has been expanded and changed in English translation)

Beše jednom jedan kritičar koji se toliko proslavio kritikama remek dela svetske književnosti da mu Esnaf Akvizitera i Trgovaca Fenomenopublike podigoše spomenik u čast i od tad se silno uobrazio – nije birao sredstva kako da potkopa pisce. Zlorabio je svoj časni položaj. Istovremeno, bio je pasionirani citalac, onoliko koliko beše loš pisac!Tad se desi nešto neobično – razgnevljene knjige, iskritikovane, niti krive niti dužne, odlučiše, makar one koje su držale do sebe kao na primer Majn Kampf i Ep o Gilgamešu da odbiju da ih kritičar čita. Nekmoli da ih komentariše. Korice je zauvek zatvorila pred njim i Biblija i Majstor i Margarita i Stepski vuk, i novokomponovana trash komercijalna knjiga za opuštanje živaca. (“Umeće Ratovanja”)Veličanstvena remek dela literature odbila su da ih ih kritičar čita. Čak su se i novine priključile. Pisana slova podigla su pobunu, rečima: “U ime autora svih vekova koje si satirao i mučio, mi knjige, odlučile smo da stanemo na put javašluku!”I zapljeskaše koricama.Kritičar pade u stanje očajanja – čitati možda nije morao, ali knjige su ga jurile svuda i skakutale za njim, lupale mu šamare, poneka bi mu se obila o glavu, padajući s najviših polica. Tad je odlučio da se obrati Borisu K. za pomoć. a Boris K na to reče:”Mislim da je vreme za psihoterapiju”I ugovori zajedničku seansu…Knjige objasniše na seansi kriticaru kako ih ne razume. One imaju svoje mane i opterećene su – naročito Kafkin Proces koji je pun frustracija, zreo za psihoanalizu, ali tu su i još neki recimo – knjige Paola Koelja koje su in denial jer ne žele da pristanu na to da nisu nešto. Kritičar, razgovarajući s knjigom Zen za početnike, shvati da mora spozna svoje unutrašnje ja da bi mogao da shvati o čemu se radi.”Oduvek sam verovao u geslo leb bez motike”, zamislio se kritičar – izbegao sam jedno, a nisam se najeo drugog”Tad se knjige sažališe na njega, dohvatiše se i izudaraše ga motkama na mrtvo ime,nakon čega kritičar ode na Tibet, tražeći prosvetljenje, miran ko Buda.Knjige ponovo pristadoše da ih kritičar čita, što je činio, ne sa malim podozrenjem.


Time 2

All equally facing the sun but the fate of various …

There are those who sprouted where they were never sown

There are those who bravely sprouted but never got used to themselves

There are those who loved anything but anything on the high branch

And on top of that suffering, we didn’t even call them

Obsessed with the time that violently enters us

Does anyone remember a time that didn’t let them down.


Author’s Note on “Resurrection 2”

we live in the eternal Sisyphus loop of rediscovering our own stone, in rooms where broken chairs stumble and people with a blind spot in their brains humiliate come out of the dungeons of consumerism, resurrecting again and again to preserve that little bit of humanity

the invitations of Jerusalem were spent
faded desert caravans
cold Siberian singers
Kentucky chickens died
I don’t know what happened to reason

we are all Zombie Lazarus in maintaining decency in moving and pushing stones, lime in hair and souls in nose … and other abominations.
Narcissus drowned long ago in a beloved lake.

illusions, projections… what could not be realized was dreamed up, what was objectively allowed was created.

effort to effort, will to will
method, procedure, instruction and effect
a quick penny and finally a stake

clean bill and dirty laundry,
poisonous milk conclusions
four walls and a bastard, all that fever
and all around, emptiness, is hungry, exhausted

deadly health loans and lighthouses
the only thing left of the renaissance
forced union-voluntary spacing

and calling witnesses


This Beggar’s Night

Like night, like death
be quiet, be apparition
grew near the nether region, from copper wires
at the bottom of the river, from the roots of the water
this wrath’s thrown to the ground
and brings a revolver to the temple
this anger defiled by isotherm primitiveness
this hunger of green blood; this night;
these combat boots, all horseshoes buried in the spine,
with breasts parted to the womb
this .. bumpy night; this night, this burping vampire
this …
a brothel night from the past
this caesarean section from the uterus of things
this desire for a world that is spit out;
four walls and a bastard, all that fever
and all around, emptiness, in the mud, among the pigs
through the seventh hole at the end of the flute
through rotten rags of sputum
this beggar fell into the mud quite fresh;
this night; this impossibility of light; her rotten rags
stained with violent shadows
her shod shoes – like open cemeteries
We buried her in that toga pulla and it’s all mud, and here are the rooms –
by which the brains in semidarkness rot.
these old scars, rebled
they did not spring in fear and trembling
They let Evil sing with owned words

Measuring life like measuring death
boiling wax from the nostrils of an enraged angel
a mountain that does not call upon god
but on Hamlet’s waiting.

Smoke and puking, a saturnine gob
muttering phosphorus
from fiery insomnia.
Firefly. Bursting. Eternally in existence



The eye of heaven (AllHallows)

Through the looking-glass

I see the suns passed away

So I parasite Moon,

In rye flour, soy and marmite

Love it or hate it,

Turn, turn

Try slathering on sauce

Praise the gods with scant ceremony

.Frightened and worriedis a breath

Moon. Cold-blooded

In the Sisyphus travelosity

Will chase away the contours from the marble stones

Where silent Sols burn between the rocks

impelled upward in the dark

If I attack the mirror

I’ll maim my tooth structure

I’ll eat the Suns, I’ll devour the Moon

I’ll tear to shreds tapeworms and flukes,

I’ll lacerate their shy bodies

Cornerless, vile corruption,

The scrape of distorted rhythm

The dryads sunbathe incensing the altars,

Onto high-heeled Vault of the Heavens

Animate droplets swept through onto a river’s flow.

A well-done job macabre

Alive, with glossy eyes

I will evanescence

On Dread’s blade

Of smooth mastery

Freeze in an enchanted night,

Looking someone else’s dead man in the eye.

Shivering in Selene’s moonlight

With fatal mouths gaping on

The eye of heaven will sovereignly rule its nights

I hate…

You,You and you and you

Though I love you all

For Allhallows.


The Esquimaux kiss

The word got drunk, in constant fear of death
she is realistic again
as a marble statue
mutilated by insidious claws
… echolocated that chiropteran organism,
  releasing a contagious breath.
As if It had once been…
corpse decomposition in the salivary ducts. – a gaping wound
How can they gape so much? Oh, rima oris
elastic moduli
ooh, wonder where it leads, through the trachea, buccal cavity ..
You could fit the carcass cavalry internally.
And what about that ornamental trimmings slime
of a pious monk curbing his sensual desires through contemplation
on an impure decaying body
his leaf-patterned undergarment covers with all that sticky mucus ..
the Suffering Servant, With the attire of a harlot,
her feet abide not in her Master’s house
had her hair and ears cut off, whipped in a state of nudity.
I was dreaming about metaphor,
The Esquimaux kiss.
“.. as sinnliche Scheinen … er ……. dee “
give me a break on the ästhetisch
things fall apart because they want to be left alone
I array myself, to extirpate the evil,
the prey slides into the glossa, 
to eke out a subsistence.
faced against the wind, my throat’s cut facing Qibla, 
Halal to all
In vain henceforth,
and yet rise up in the unknown powers
uff-da, blacksmith chains for the gods,
persevere in the mud
In unsuccessful attempts to endure the night
fear wielding its freezing slasher
you’ve done exactly the right thing every time and again.


Photo Credit:



Kafka’s Jar

In formalin aqueous the unciphered poets throat rests,

Reserved for crooning, preserved potential pretense. 

The gardener shapes the earth’s intervals,

With surgical gloves and gardening gauntlets.

Helios above, warms us when he finds us worthy.

The music box, densely lacquered wood delirious, 

Retches swarming wonders; crepuscule cicadas,

Bastioned by sandblasted desert squall,

Attested by twin anima’s.

Kafka slumber supine screams roars from burning bush,

Searing the Emperor of Troy sighs;

“Beware the Trojan goat…”

Telenovelas splashing waves of liquid pasts in transplanted organs,

Freaks from a bottled history. 

Small towns encirculate, 

Mountaineers, with murky ireful eyes, would wet their maws,

and the stygian lags of Cimmerian shade are permeating virally.

Onyx octopus tentacles dread spread eternally.

Kafka precipitates to emaciate.

I am still at the throat.

Kafka ululates Don Quixote’s tragedy;

Not misfortune by imagination but by Sancho Panza.

A decade after deceased formalin poet,

Tuberculosis throat takes Kafka too,

Deprivation of nutrition, starvation, inanition,

Kafka departs the coil.

Kafka in čavka, in the daw the obsidian woods rise horrible,

Two decades too early to prostrate at Shoah’s door

…And fall…in smoke.

Just as the formalin poet he enunciated…with notes.

An empty throat. 

Trachea enflamed unrestrained,

Formalin and Kafka deranged wail in the wasteland,

…Of pale riders on deathless equine.

Do they keep Kafka’s throat in a jar?

Like pickled cucumbers, carrots and beets brined?

Or formalin in formaldehyde, pharynx, larynx, thorax and vocal chords.

Jericho trumpeting blares billowing,

The seven Kafkaesque howls.

Destruction and fire, wrought iron spirals,

Linguistic deconstruction detest,

Kafka crawls caress, donning intergalactic invertebrates.

Kafka ever awaits at the closed doors of terror,

Apocalypse armies annihilate across barriers,

Zombie carriers, mummification legions,

With rotten fish flesh flailing,

And snipers in Cathedral spires scoped.

With the abomination of these desiccating defences,

Contemptuous angular jagged edges,

A new world holocaust arises,

Coronal coronation of viruses.

And Kafka beetled is king,

From within his diaphanous jar.



It would be romantic… to imagine…

I was an unusual personality

In which two opposing cultures, religions,

Traditions were united,

In the collision of the East and the West

Unknowingly, through the veins, the verses overlap,

And the eastern stories are running.

It would be exotic to say, like Leo Africans

“I am a son of the road, and my land is my caravan.”

As such, I define the antithesis of the tribe

I do not belong to any city, nor any path,

nor any end or beginning

Nor I come both from Europe or Arabia

Nor I belong to anyone.

I’m a stranger among people,

I’m a stranger who is hiding in the shadows of the night

I tumble between the walls, whose fear cannot be rid of,

For I have come to the utmost memory,

Until the end of mystery, in a life that is a crowd

Of sad and tragic stories, not one, but more lives

Without leaving apart,

And what I write is just a hidden choice

To appear on the canvas of creation.

I’m walking eras and worlds, through space,

As in a dream.

I stumble like a ghost in a stormy night somewhere,

Trapped, confused in the darkness of the human dream.

My solitude lasts three thousand years.

This is the place between the worlds,

The place in which everything merges

What is otherwise separated

It would be expressive to say ..

But what am I psychobabbling about?

I’m rambling again, aren’t I?

I thought my secret’s were bigger than the clouds

I had never stepped on

I laughed and was







I had my private double, a lunatic

Whom I could show

For the show

Restrained by my unprofitability,

With the halter embroidered

Of small guilt and great remorseI pass by you

o immortal gods with a million hands

I nocturne by the walls from which the shadows had escaped

Let ‘face it, I’m a misfit


Squirrelly meshugge

(Do you know … sometimes the morning cries in fear that…it will never dawn)



The otherworldly letters I received from Charles Baudelaire on the nights of August 20 to August 27, 2000

Mon petite marquise,

I see you found me somehow. You have a long reach…
your heart is truly aching to be heard and mine constantly aches in search of its songs longing to be heard.
This sounds wonderfully challenging my petite marquise and I am eagerly awaiting these bountiful re-words 1st glanced upon inspirationally shared reminder of your gift’s surpassed rarity of achieving one’s goal’s of inclusion’s all encompassing uniqueness of percerving life’s ongoing reflective self empowerment’s abilty’s unto others seeking solaces redemtive fully understood compassionate mysticisms carefully laid before them in hopes of seeing someone’s mirrored imagery right behind them backing their own stories no matter what stands in front of these attempts to be in the moment’s where just knowing someones guiding the hand you’ve held is all that truly matters.
Please lets begin chapter’s one’s onwards in and throughout your book of knowledges page by page turn of events.

I will maintain a 2 hour window daily throughout my work week in offering any guidelines acceptably sent back and forth between us until you are completely agreed upon its fruition of beliefs deemed suitably acceptable with your ideas original intents.
1 in the morning before with the 2nd when I arrive back in the Hotel de Lauzun, 17, quai d’Anjou usually before 9 pm.
And then the weekend’s like this one past will be my own recuperative times narratives focusing solely on my own similarly poetic journals of rediscovery and literally letting go of what needs of mine allow me to by penmanships sinking like a stones repeatedly cast 1st 2nd and 3rd if my own needs are not met.

And please, if you have any ideas of how mine could be more easily understood in the manner of fluidity I am completely open and have been eagerly waiting for creatively intensifying its representantions effects?

votre ami dévoué, Charles


Please lets take it a much more carefully paced assistance this time in hopes of recognizing eachothers needs in hopes of inspiring one another’s creativity rather than stifling each ideas potential.
I know I over stepped my bounds in offering assistance immediately and then having to step back from being overwhelmed with my inability to realistically carrying a weight of responsibility that was in no way meant to be cruel in doing so rather an admittance of my artistic hearts reaching out to help another’s but then breaking each time mine weakened by years of being broken itself by over 30 years of disappointments reoccuring that it simply could not bear your disappointments in mine as well.
I have thought regularly of how you were doing but was scared of upsetting you again by visiting your poetry grave in the Cimetiere de Montparnasse

Engaged with ones
Beckoning sky’s kissed
Encaged with suns
Reckoning lies missed

Hunched over gatherings
Along freed loved fences lengths
Bunched clover, rather brings
A strong need of defenceless strengths

Hunger urged
Backboneless cuts
Wonders purged
Lack shown less guts

Souls scared of
My poetic responses
Tolls, dared love
“Show ethnic free nuances”

Woman obsolete
Through bliss Am I
No man robs, though elite
To this damn try

A known readjustment’s
Inconclusively thunderous applause
Alone we had lust meant
“Grin on whose give under us collapsed laws”

Reducing this beliefs brethrens
Clevery lasting laid upon hand’s
Seducing kiss, beneath heavens
Everlasting praid up on lands

Unproven life’s free sentence
To try hopeless dependency’s
One proven knife’s repentance
To my “hope less tendencies!”

Souls scared of
My poetic responses
Tolls, dared love
“Cry no ethnic free nuances “

Embrasse Josseline pour moi

Ma petite marquise,
Incredibly well pictured moments of humanity’s inhumane devoutly followed faith within their encouragable society’s abilities of poverty’s eagerly sense less concerned with entrapment than freely offering kindnesses returns.
How beautifully choreographed these rarely heard rhythmic beats fall from your uprisings literary thought as if to invite and invoke penmanship’s voice to dance across your tongue of a spoken word longing to heard from your song of choice.
Ok my maîtresse Josseline just called and is on her way over.
I’d like to pick where we left off when next we converse ?
Yours truly prefers to stay anonymous Charles
p.s Your secretly sought after poetry’s portrayals turn abouts, opportunity’s beliefs best suited points shared beliefs are offering in this our written life’s transfigurations contracts placed in times accordance of rebuilding these once broken doors of opportunitys that we now stand for by reminiscing poetically of be fronted justices cause to unite peacefully before the those forgotten within reveal themselves rejuvenated by our rights left uncharted perhaps by their own fears blinded efforts to remember love’s potential as well.

p.s I need a loan, My petite marquise.. no more than 200 francs. My lucrative publishing contract is just around the corner, but the situation I find myself in is too difficult to turn to Caroline .. my mother has always been sad about my inappropriate behavior. Oh, what a grief!


Mon cher ami Charles,

Pour reprendre les propos de mon cher ami, Mansa Musa, the ruler of West Africa and the wealthiest man who has ever existed la meilleure réponse à cette question est sans doute “non”

I cannot imagine your monumentally struggles, engagement within to be heard without suppressions ever listening suppressive fears of you and your message’s whispering scream of awakening society’s deafened sense turning a blind eye whenever freedom’s mentioned hope of for all literally scares those self descriptive elites from their point of views never ending nightmares readily changing wills of casting their first stones throne high archy based solely on being dead set against those daring their set in stone’s refusal to be held responsible for holding back free wills neverending dreams to not let go of your hopes to inspire others

La Petite Marquise

Ma petite,

Though my efforts to change societally influenced attitudes struggles with the minutest comparitive of yours,
My own similarity as a small part in our spiritually orated potentialities to change today’s water making attempts of flowing idealisms, recreates its intoxicating effects seen right before our eyes always half cupped optimistically looked up on as sideways towards life’s hand in hand journey to never look down on others as I have, simply because I can.

My selfimposed state of hell which dominated my life’s neverending hell’s of isolation’s keenly placed prison states of thoughts terrifying thoughts into continuing my torture for that 30 years sentence of solitary confinements nightmares of never allowing me to wake from its steely barbed wired fenced in and off from others grasping direly to the hopes of me breaking free.
Since then self admittedly starved to bone of sunlights promise of a new day only long for even a moment’s touch of any sensation other than darnkeness preludes of fearfully returning me into its waiting crushing paralyzing me with fears presences always seemingly lurking in its unbeknownst shadows of opportunities once had and lost by mistakes neverending conclusion of its lifelong sentences of documented guilt!
My greatest fear is of returning to madnessess reign of terror. My guilt which I have spoken of and finally faced after all those years of running from myself left scars so unbearable to let me live my feeble attempts to secretly bury them within myself represents drove to the brink of a madness so indescribable in its descriptive unforgettable unfathomable certainty of literally a fate worse than death.
Blacking out was my only saviour.
Leave me alone?!”
And BANG !!
I hit the floor, Josseline heard the crash, came out and stayed with until I came out of my reverberating position on the floor and looked up at her wondering where I was while convincing her that as I went to get a broom to clean up the mess I had made

“Everything is going to be alright!!”

My thrashing up and down on the bed as each time I bite a small piece of my tongue off while spitting out flem and turning red with heat and eventually waking up to see the fear as I stumble around the place mumbling incoherent words of confusions hinted immently waiting dementia until I finally come out of it completely the next morning.
My entire fate is in the hands of the spirit that has guided me since I was 4 years old.
I cannot take any opiates due to my elongated method of returning for increasing the dosage to its point of no return.
I had been an alcoholic since finding its temporary numbness of childhood tears since the age of 12 years old.
My addictive highs led me lows of adjoining suicidal thoughts that have confirmed over and over again its waiting for me if still interested? Time is the only valuable boundary I humbly ask in need of your freely offered suggestions of your invaluably creative words of art.
I am in a completely and never more happily challenging at times it seemingly all consuming lover’s relationship.
Josseline’s love literally saves my soul from it’s own innate self destructive longing to write an obituary’s requiem of what could have been if only….
I need her needs of my undivided minds attentive states of varying unwearied readiness within its ever changing illusions placed before me so its after effects of realizing what I have either accomplished unknowingly or let’s it been known of her concerns about the lack thereof.

When I make and then mistakenly turn away his guidance of peacefully admitting its making of ammends to my obviously showing after effects while incomplete denial from my part of and in its promised never again reoccurrence is suddenly rebuked by my guiders compliance of asking its presence temporarily depart until I figure things out for myself.

I now have no where left to run, but the faces of those asking for help and my cowardice in my eagerness to say yes and my delays in doing so after in realizing.
I once again have overstayed my bounds of realistically abilities to do so.
I wanted to be your hero and foolishly thought my hidden weaknesses would somehow continue your belief in me as one.
Truth’s cannot be suppressed until realiziations of my obvious unlimited limits for me personally has become better than ever as my escaping personationations impostering as unto e arrogance.
… to have any affect of suturing my torn souls inevitable agenda of literally do or madly face a fate worse than death.
Madness itself.
I finally faced this hidden secret that I too had for my own sanity erased from my psyches memory.

gros bisous,


This is a compassionate cry from one spiritually connected poetic heart to another hoping yours can remain so in hearing mine cries out for yours but is beaten to point where penmanships sails have set in motion a dawning darkness whose forever changing destructive forces seemingly strengthen in due course their abilities of altering our creativily shared hopes well designed horizon’s reaching out with both our hands but all ways seemingly just out of in doing so.

Ma petite!
How beautiful is and was your true intent all along when seen as yours of a truly reflective heart in search of an artist’s longing to be finally understood in her search perhaps to understand why she has been given this gift to share yet is burdened by her fears that no one else will be able accept its offer from her based freely on their acceptance of what they themselves may or may not be ready to accept?
Truly I am honoured and humbled upon your gracious and inspiring belief in my abilities.
And yes I believe ours could be an ongoing life’s enhancing looked forward daily challenged and faced together separately and yet their for each other whenever in need of guide in either penmanship or suddenly awakened by one’s momumental poetic moments of need and in to be spurred on by an encouraging word to continue its ideas potentiality through to seev this time and hence each and every time from this and that moment on where it takes you and myself as adventurers in rhyme and who will join us in our soon to be fabled journey.
I had awoken in hopes of perhaps sharing with you my thoughtful throughought the night thoughts inspired acknowledgement of your inquiries and was eagerly about to see if they actually rang true with yours?
However yours far exceeded any hopes I had dreamt of.
I was hoping though I could continue to share these with you?
Were you pertaining to how man’s uniquely shared abilities of attaining the highest forms in spirituality can only be attained upon the realization that he is the sole proprietor in this inherent ability to lose himself on this neverending search for why he seems to be eternally a loss while continuously questioning why this time he is always within himself lost
Please accept this first acceptance of another’s shared guidance with mine that each beautifully orchestrated language has its uniqueness that transcends translations attempts to clarify when an audiences sought after idealism’s transcending ability is found in their own lifes search to be found and finally understood in at times even one stanza or well worded soliloquy.
Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder and those truly seeking beauty, from what I’ve seen in your gift will truly find it themselves through you when they themselves cannot put to paper what so artistically yours continues to help them grow through and along with your ongoing growth as an artist.
Thank you again as the spark of intrigue can ignite the flames of hope’s peacefully offered warmth through its well lit darkneses of inspirationally shared interests and yours in mine calmly and reassuredly has added fires to the flames.
At the age of 49 I have experienced 5 physicians shared diagnosis of separate nervous breakdowns.
4 I kept to myself out of fears of being returned to the this life hospital.
I had a rare reaction to my addiction to opium which only intensities my isolation’s effectiveness to separate and destroy.
Please take care and be reassured that I am earnestly looking forward to our continued conversations


(a few nights later)

Long story short…

The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde was written on a six day cocaine binge, and I … I dream of hanging on a pipe, I am in trouble and in distress, madam. I would praise anything that is immoral, unhealthy and disgusting.
You must be tired of my deep self, full of mystery, indefiniteness, horror, dark and vague forebodings.
You are but a disorganized and scattered multitude of images and labels that get their meaning and harmony only in the imagination of the creator and thus turn into his subjective reality. Your poetry is a big scandal.
See what you made me do!
You, demon, martyr and damned. I hope they will deny you access to the church. You are a monstrous mongrel, a lying, ruthless, self-confident black Venus, which I turned into a beautiful girl.
I even corresponded with you!
If only you had sent me 200 francs …
If you’d like to correspond about YOUR official poetry with your picturistic fears of entering oneself into your bravely revealed systematically choreographed attempts to destroy what no man can or ever will. – and that is the eternity of MY moment! – let me tell you something:
Artistic freedoms challenges to and for the state to change itself through the blunt force of face to face recognitions of what was and continues to simply because the perpetrators of these horrendous crimes against humanity can.

Revelation is feared
And has the power
Of fears abilities
To change with
Or face the inevitable
Fear of change alone
In being left behind

I would like to begin sharing this voice”s guidance for and with you again but there MUST BE SET BOUNDARIES OF REALIZATION that,( if you Google (Do not think that I do not know what it is! Your deity!) the affects of long term use and subscription withdrawal from opiate) am basically rebuilding and constantly attempting through seemingly never ending day throughout night’s of rigorously reconstructive emotional psychological physical social therapeutically exhaustion.
It reached the point of a tartive dyscanatia that required speach therapy at our this life hospital, this life, this life is a hospital! and which also as you could imagine made most aspects of my healing attempts even more difficult to achieve any sense of securing more than temporary states of even the smallest momentary victories .
If I hurt I am very sorry and embarrassed by my panicked immediate uncertainty of what I had shout and could even do if my worries became a reality in your written words state(d) unrelenting spiritual and psychological torments?!
….and I can only hope you understand in your heart what mine needs to continue healing itself’s work from within?
I’ve mentioned this before I believe?
It’s make or break for me
Right now!
I cannot go near opiates having devices a taken like candy’s habitual problem whose nightly next seconds of nearly losing my mind has me more scared of them than any pain itself.

Charles, 200 fr


I am sorry to see you are in need of help.
But I am at the point in my life where I realize if I am hurting myself in being there for anyone else’s pain and suffering I truly am not offering anything other than the temporarily shared illusion of the ability to do something I simply cannot.
I did not realize you attempted to contact me 2 days ago with honestly the words of which I stopped at rather than continuing on to your messaged request having sensed my heart breaking in knowing I can’t be there for yours.
I am not a mean woman a coward or acting out of cruelty’s turned deaf ears to your cries Charles.
I am simply – bankrupt

This is a compassionate cry from one spiritually connected poetic heart to another hoping yours can remain so in hearing mine cries out for yours but is beaten to point where penmanships sails have set in motion a dawning darkness whose forever changing destructive forces seemingly strengthen in due course their abilities of altering our creativily shared hopes well designed horizon’s reaching out with both our hands but all ways seemingly just out of in doing so.
Take care of your unbeatable heart Charles in knowing the connected rhythms within will never be without.
And when I saw my potentiality’s moment of a thunderously conclusive readjustment of their theoretically unproven life sentences of hopelessness self dependency’s .
I made my supposedly inconceivable mad dash for freedoms inspirationally welcoming arrival within and unless it was to close another chapters reassessment from my points moments by moments others well self preserved moment by moments prospects for healing a well intentioned turning of the pages never to be looked backed upon refusal’s of cant you see it in their eyes kind of sorry of story’s magnitudanalunly accepted acceptance of all those phases out ofv cant and be looked down or back up on!
If I could offer you one last peace of advice if you’re interest me has wained, as I too am lost at times in our mutually read uncertainty’s meaningful offered reassuring words of encouragement’s revealing worlds a part of mutually acquired wisdom’s approach to situationally associated uttered states of reflective confusions.
Even going back to our originally documented conversations there was always this taste of disolutionments challenges put into perspective when finally understood upon expectations shared narratives of concern.
In no way let go of your darknessess lights of rarity’s survival until you are good and ready to do so!
I wrote all years to stay alive
And now after I decided it was time for my own retrial and errors of sorts.
I am ready have recognized the want and need to feel alive at last again!
I at one time though when it was deemed the rambling in my irrefutably non sensical manner of tongues my message that not only would seemiglly never seem get across to any included within my message to the masses
I would begin to actually heal myself by temporarily bearing this burdaning overwhelmingly proportionalized burdensome crutch of unsustainable nonsupportive reliability
of living for others in attempts to heal myself.
But honestly I found this an exhaustively neverending source mutually noticed and possibly neverending seemingly unbeknownst needless needing to my hands) to one’self’s washing of my hands thoroughly misrepresented nonreconcilatory turning aways from truly coincidentally running into a person of interests to you m.
For talking simpletalk with in away that truly never lasted for more than its temporarily true version of oneself self revered state of importanc’es needs of recognition at the very least
It was until I took a step back to see the worlds around and see out right longing.of the people of non- coincidental opportunistically offered simplification of life’s truly treasuring day by day conversations of others individually motivating peoples of interests.
If you help even just one similarly outfitted one as such.
The wealth of this treasuring inner peace’s Unheard of mirrors.the souls pricelessnesss by looking in to the windows thie once selfendulgent magnitudally lost moment in time while receiving the resways within distances evechainging .


Madness is a state of mind
Frightening in the eyes of and never eyes upo of the beholder’s viewers like you .
And make no mistakes that all imperfections are perfectly situateted one on one nonconversational right in front the (wo)man
If you were able to work for you, Charles!
And you’re
Take care of ….

Ma petite marquise,

Tears are flowing with your honoured acceptance of my presence in your valiant struggle mon petit marquise
Thank you
Good night as you have made my dreams come true with its validity”s confided and never before so confirmed belief in from someone whose talents I have never seen before and look up to as my possible mentor of truth’s power in poetic written form.
I have never been so proud to be a part of a team.
Rest though I am so excited is in need.
And I will thoroughly read your letter in a better light when my dimming mechanism is as rejuvenated as me in this brand new light of days ahead to come.
I think the time has finally come for me to accept that I am dead.




(Dedicated To Corpses, The Beginning Of Ascent) 

 They are dreaming…

In the gardens of Everest, their skulls are hatching sleeping worlds,

Corpses lined in white mare tides…

In pearlescent gardens frozen fingers farmed,

A catamaran of cadavers voyage,

Peering, piercing my fluorescent boots.

At mountains foot; I, driven by the same pyre of Titan’s progeny as permafrost ghosts of yore,

Where earth dwells eternal in limbotic gloom,

And no recompense rewarding corpses ravishing……

…. that never die!
Frost nightingales, closed breath, hands crossed on chests,

Cadaveric beatific, musical marching Everest troops

singing together:
“When all the doors are barricaded,

I still have my mountain to climb.

Behold! I am at the summit!

This is my fate, to set backfires to Gods!

Beware, Sagarmatha, beware!”
Alas, I see now, they are all rather in tatters.

I continue my ascent towards the top temporally transposed.

A treachery for Man and fowl,

To the hoary bitten hell in lonesome choosing,

In airs of complacency,

Yodel-Ay-Ee-Ooo! Gods, do you envy me?!

Like Moses, He precedes me,

Through mountain glass transfixed in shatters,

I am a rock in the wind,

I am a tear in the eye,

I am a warm lie.
Embracing my bones; arid and withered,

Lips caress kiss glazier crystal.

I’m travailing cumuli under savage sky,

The snow veil asphyxiating me…

Fate turned to ruthless ragged raged,

Mountain side with feral fangs.

Assured, confidant, raise me with rope entwined,

Pledged fealty to your opal peaks skyward.

Everest, God’s temple of Dune!

The face of fear!

This insane passion for freedom!

Treachery viligancy to trick dreams morosely.

Rope hold the line!

Axe splines supine!

Skaoi divine, I implore, 

With frosted hands conjoined,

Bare me to heights whither to unknown,

Upon your brawny bow!
We could not absolve our sin,

Nor forgive them.

The world long past,

A grey remittent toy,

Housed in forlorn haunts rejoined.
All eyes upon my pitiless axe!

The axe that rends animas from dresses!

Tears spirits from suites!

Abrogates spirits from abyss’s!

I am piercing peaks,

I am slashing summits,

Eviscerating elevations,

I am murdering the mountain!

The stone exsanguinates…and so do I.
Pater meus, I will not surrender this ascent,

I have tasted the peaks plasmal lust!

Ascension/descension in ecliptic prance dance,

The stars kaleidoscope in nauseous conjunction above.

Delirious risen hiked heights,

Devout surge scale surmount,

Conquering crests crescendo.
Broken mirror, beloved shards painted blue,

Ourea in ice arouse,I am traversing you!

Mother Himalayan Chomolungma,

I am prostrate in ruined depletion dire,

With no more words to wail,

Hymns to howl,

Or Logos to lament.
Dormant worlds below melt in deviled mists,

But in brumal promethean flairs,

I’m become the monster of the mountain!

The pathfinder eternal lost,

A ghost amongst the elevations,

Loathsome…and excommunicated.


The Sign Of Abel

Cain processed the first olive grove in history and managed to isolate olive oil. Abel was watching him out of the corner of his bloody eyes, getting up late at noon, but making sure that Cain had gathered all his, Abel’s cattle in the morning.

Abel was a cheap drinker and a destructive creature, unleashing cataclysmal force and tremendous violence at every step. As they say for Edgar Alan Poe nowadays, he drank like a barbarian.Then Abel would walk among the cattle, in a large cloth raincoat, reminiscent of some Arabic ifrit, having breakfast in the early afternoon, bread, cheese and bacon, puffy from lazy laying around

“Let’s go, beasts,” he muttered, holding a wide-brimmed hat in one hand and scourge in the other, to sit under the Erebus tree in utter boredom, carving various wooden objects with a “made in heaven” knife, pouring prehistoric booze down his throat from a wooden cup he carried in a canvas bag. The cattle knew that Abel was coming because he was announcing his arrival with a skilful crackling of the whip. The cattle would then be upsetWhenever Abel swung his whip, the cattle would pounce on him to defend themselves, and Abel would hollered for them to take off. He was screaming so loud:

“Let go of my fingers. Cain, heeelp! This cattle is biting my fingers!Let my foot off Get off me! “

But the cattle bit his hand and left a mark on him…Abel often abused cattle in moments of leisure. During the break, he would complain to the Almighty. It would seem that time was something Abel had plenty of.”Why didn’t you make some shepherdess for me, to spin, sew, tie and drink together on the pasture?” Abel used his spiky and particularly cruel whip to make his cattle move away from the pasture near the yard, and to go to Cain’s field, and when he drank too much he chased Cain with iron forks used for collecting manure: “Why do I have to carry manure to the manure all the time! Come on, tell me a story to cheer me up. ””I should tell our mother – Cain complained, kept whining, saying Abel had attacked him.But still, Cain would do Abel’s work when Abel fell asleep, drank too much, wiped straps of straw and dry leaves from the ground, and then one day decided to complain to the Most High – he engraved his submission in Aramaic on a large rock:

1. a sin against one who has grapes in the tubers

“Sir, as a diligent farmer, as someone whose oysters in the tavern are never empty, I must complain that Abel stole my pot from the tavern again and drank all the wine from my vineyard, and what he cannot drink, he is sorry. to spill .. so it shouldn’t go to waste and leave it all for tomorrow.It’s like a poison soaked into the ground- and I plowboy am diligent, there are always grapes in the tubers. As a sacrifice, I am giving you a very expensive brandy “Paradise” to help me in my difficult trouble – Abel will drink it all anyway.

2. The sin of the rabbits

Sir, Abel whip drives rabbits to my orchard and a variety of venison to damage my fruit. I protected the orchard by fencing the fruit with galvanized wire, and that didn’t even work.Rabbit raids on my orchard are his favorite pastime.I take lard, then heat it in a cauldron in the orchard, and put fishmeal.It worked. Rabbits scratched on the fat, but they didn’t bite, I guess it was too greasy… But heresies!The lower branches on the apples and pears, they happened to be damaged and everything was bitten

.3. Abel, the firestarter

Sir, Abel is a sociopath. He started a fire several times, trampled the sprouted wheat and burned the stubble in my fields. They are not worth a fence or a scarecrow. There is a hole in his psyche. He is manipulative – our parents trust him completely – he is insincere, egocentric and suffers from a lack of guilt. He is cynical and exhibitionist. Father, Abel is a destructive, perverted being. In addition, I must add that he is also an alcoholic. If you don’t do something, an unstoppable circle of crimes will take over your pastures.

Then the voice of God thundered behind the clouds, and the voice of God said,”Shoe goes on, shoe goes off. Go and walk with your sins,as in bad shoes . You see a speck in your brother’s eye, and a log .. hmm. What did I want to say .. Ah, yes! Uh. Cain, what did you do!How hast thou charged thy brother with accusations to establish what is rusty, decayu to him! And..I’ve got a pebble in my shoe, too. And–it’s too painful. Just it’s just too tedious to discuss.”

“I’m just saying ..”

“A drunk in the bunkhouse, and a circus following me – Just like in the movies, huh… nevermind. What did your father and mother tell you?”

“They say I’m a liar! They say that Abel does all that is righteous in the sight of Yahweh. All three of them sit all day and drink my wine under Erebus tree”

“Hmmm … – I’ll give you a test. – Beg for the favor of Jehovah and soften his face! Bring a gift to the altar. Whose gift I am more pleased with, I will bless him and give him the title to be the first priest of all the highlands, lord of all fields and crops, and whip made of flames, cattle and other treasures – and now go, walk on my land and no longer cuckoo on your brother”

And they both did what Jehovah told them. After that, there was war over all the days from then until this time, and it was a sign that Jehovah judged well, expelling the one who first attacked and killed, to the settlements east of the Erebus trees, because he found guilt in the murderer whose the tribe further expands and multiplies.To this day a distant cry is heard from the shadow of the exiled:

“Devil’s exorcist! Let go of my fingers!Let go of my fingers!Abel, heeelp! “

Abel sees it all from the sidelines, looking at his mark at the strip in the shape of a trefoil knot. THE MELOI KHRYSEOI (Golden Sheep) were a flock of vicious, golden-fleeced sheep with poisonous bites, a sheep that Abel especially loved to beat.

Then Abel laughs and laughs and laughs, but from time to time, every few centuries, he is looking so serious.

Just like in the movies, huh?


Gardening in the Desert

When I fled from Atlantis,

the noon was looking for its shadow,

the emporium was pounding with trepidation,

the palm trees were suffocating.

Where are you? Outside? Inside?

Above the clouds of detraction,

at night when the lights of the lagoon blaze,

and golden drops burn in the murky water…

Or below, like water thrown from one cliff to another,

for years, down, into the uncertain.

And I’ve been running away from Atlantis for forty-four centuries,

towards the Kaaba in Meccaand

while the noon was pounding with trepidation

in the drums of the bazaar, the palm trees were suffocated.

In the records of time sufferers are drifting and falling,

The Blind from one moment to the next,

The torment belongs to the desert.

Should I make a garden out of the desert?

Do hoi polloi need a barren land?

Should I open an airy magical wilderness garden?

Where are you running to, lunatic?

Behind the door of politeness,

beyond the boundaries of orderly longings?

Oh, good luck then!

Thus begins fear, contemplation,lamentation, anxiety,

to the farthest extremes a new era unfolds

My head with a double edged scimitar

They severed from my shoulders,

And stuck it on high, above this world,

in the shades.


From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Full name Leila Samarrai Mehdi

Date of birth October 19th, 1976 (age 44)

Place of birth Kragujevac, Serbia, SFRY

The most important works:

The Darkness Will Understand (poetry book)

Puppets” (theatre play)

“The Adventures of Boris K.” (the collection of short stories)

Leila Samarrai, also as Leila Samarrai Mehdi (Kragujevac, 1976), is a writer and translator of Serbian-Arab origin. She writes poetry, stories, plays and novels with frequent use of fiction and humor. [1] [2]She studied Spanish language and Hispanic literature. She made her debut in literature in 2002, winning the competition for the first book of the Student Cultural Center in Kragujevac. Apart from the Serbian language, she published smaller works in Hungarian and Spanish. She lives and works in Belgrade.



The Existence Of Reality


The guillotine would have fallen,

But for rusting cloying chains, 

Another patron complained,

That his head still remained,

Atop shoulders of existential dread.

Others amongst the rabble more fortuitous; 

“The lucky reduction of torment.”

(from an unknown author, exasperated, vexed, perplexed).

The crowd cries for her crucifixion,

“Disappear” they jeer!

A woman who’s not here,

(head falls into the basket, the audience cheers).

I am huddled in my bed,

Covered toe-to-head,

In emerald ash borer beetles of psyche keeps me company.

Pollution profanation, omnipresent,

Aqua sodden douse, bedraggled universal,

Psychotic scorpion flies erupting ubiquitously,

The material reduction deluge inescapable.

Divinity, hear me (says another poet):

I surrender essence to amaurotic amore ecstasy,

To abet fiendish fell experiments on sapiens,

To be your fourth Anti-Christ!

“What do you want?” sighs the daemon.

Hail sweet malice!

These foul malignant mortals need eternal silencing in pyre!

There are flickering color-storms remote from my tormented sights,

The head rises once more,

The skull also ascends.

For now in the gloaming unlight,

I am going mad, by blessing of the cataclysmic midnight. …Bollocks.

Unsought objectionable, 

Undesired detestable, 

Unwelcome unworthy, 

Rejected dejected, 

Shun spurned, bitch-slapped and friendless.

With heart alone and solus, I cared not.

Now has begun my transition!

You’ll find pleasure through tribulations,

In shudder burning water rat-a-tat, stately in flames.

We are the womb, we are the abyss,

 We are the tomb, we are exhumed,

We are the vault, torch lit,

We are the crematorium, pyre pit,

We are the womb, we are the abyss,

We are the mausoleum, crypt kissed.

I submit my ethereal dream divine;

Of a destitute penury district,

I tender the beggar’s beautiful equipment;

Ragged white tights with black polka dots,

One solitary garbage bag, and a lonesome money can.

I offer you the saint who lived as a beggar,

Vagabonds solemnise humanity spitting on mankind,

Commodity and chattels, filthy rags of vagrants maligned.

O Nature, made of mercury,

Eternal enigmatic, aloof abstruse, arcane unfathomable.

You are clement, you are brumal, you are arid, you are sultry…

Whose end…is God.

Vomiting, retched out slimy bodies from my voice box,

Grim re-echoes in the dark,

Holding failed wigs in despondent hands,

And the humored rats whose presence is forgotten.

For the corpses do not die,

For the damned do not die,

For they do not die, from The Iliad to Civid19…


Am I not also corpsed stillness for your eternal mortuary arts?!

I am huddled in my sarcophagus soliloquy,

Sheets stand upright,

Suffused with semen, pullulate and sprout,

Spread to muscles devout,

Tissue, blush, luxurious cheek,

Oculi’s a glow in the din!

Hands traverse the glacial keening gale,

Bellend, I, wandered worlds and clapped my hands.

Only whispers, then wheezing, then wailing, then sobbing, then shrieking…

Then the dogs begin to howl…

This fell monstrosity everlasting,

This abhorrence is undying,

This vulgarity villain is eternal!

Carry me.

Carry me whither to, the existence of reality.

(grave bursting)

Schizophrenic brother in need

Never again alone we bleed.

Photo Credit:


Anemone (Breath of Wind)

The spherical gush, gutted fish, the black ghost knife,

Verso verb velocity at the shadow fire opera,

Pitch blasted throats, obsidian soul vocal chords.

blood pulse carouse,

I become flame word on inflammable parchment,

I become the refuse that doesn’t die in dire,

You are the luminescence that doesn’t expire.

A women whom reapers fail to tread, nor scythes to harvest,

Like myself; ensorcell and spell sempiternal.

Dominion over a huge…black…whisper…

Dissolving in the teeth of death’s cut trees,

That lispers immortally in terrified misspell.

Fish gnawed cross of wood and brass,

Quick as flash lightning bound by fangs,

Four wolf packs slithe and vanishing serpents,

Exigency in hungry worlds,

Pictures scuttled on the ocean floor. 

It is the time of the dead, 

From beginning to end,

The time of the dead.

The time of the living – in the vapids and cruels;

The black is breaking…

The black is breaking…

The Ides of March, there lay the albatross,

Poor beggar – unknowing, unthinking and blind

,In a threatening verse he preferred to die.

But winged Icarus pervades,

It’s tolling the zither quietly,

And the wind cries: “Anemone”

I’m cutting the ties, the Empire dies, in entangling shadows,

Naked God crucified in the commons.

And man on earth walks alone,

Sanguined feet marching to Adam’s sepulchre.

You played God and God danced along,

You played the devil, peddled your essence, paltered your prescience.

You are:

Insurgent exemplar!

Conjurer empiricist!

Caesar executioner!

You are Harlequin!

You are Icarus!

You are Prometheus!

You are a corpse that never dies.


Poems from my travels, Barcelona, Part Two “Finio”


Part One


Don’t mind my words…,(in loud voice) 

Dead and Alive! I visit you from grave to grave, 

even though the emperor orders us to return to

where we can be happy, where inner voices whisper

for I have come into a welcome darkness, 

deep and all-encompassing, 

at the feet of the dead prince of the Roman carnival,

 in the rift between two uncertainties, two states and remorse, 

what you suspected I was and what I did not know I was becoming.
.. is here.

All this ..


it is the incarnation, the roar

of the corpses of the long-dead,
all this … digging, digging… the light of rage
I am a golden vein from which debris drips

 and I whine in the grip of monstrous teeth

I am a surreal image

moving in tense dreams under tight eyelids.

A bloody, bizarre story in a kind of book 

where one page is written from scratch, 

with variations, with follow up cacofonia of a broken record    

And crown with weeds our pandoras of mythical horror
 And warm our blind ruins with the sun,
And break our howling of tanned throats 

with the ricochet of their howling,
 Amen when it’s all over,
dust to dust, ruins to ruins
and it all goes on

EMPEROR: (noticeably upset)

As everything continues,
You will go to another planet, to another sea
and you will find a grave better than this.
you forgot a lot – various little things – that justified you enough
Down, through long links of esse all unvexed
Where birth and death meet.
to die at the bottom of yourself, in the depths of the forest, 

where no one will find you
to die in the basement of confiscated thoughts,
to die in a ghostly square, in a rehearsal in loneliness,
  Among your fairest thoughts, 

your tallest flowers,
From root to crowned elevations 

beyond pain to your crucifix ..

 I would die like that
to die, to flash bucolic,
as a stage, saturated – unreal

 in such a landscape
but not you, it’s too dry for you … 

like a pipeline vivisection
By all ghosts of hybris birds,
having appeared by night gleaming
like lightning bolt upright the Tarpeian fate
insolent the pheasant you are
behold the day of throwing the heads 

of their murdered singing cries
all told Tarpeia is close to Capitol
Let the eons of accumulated remorse pass
mine are, by Jove, monstrously large and bright
for a titanic – domineering life .. 

crammed into wobbly carriages
pulled by slaves
as everything continues sliding towards

the Music of the blue invisible spheres, 

with torches in the darkness
and I am completely alone with myself.

TRAVELLER: “Is that an order?”

EMPEROR: “Yes. It’s an order.
Press thy face to pedoliths or peds
 My immortality is there.
Now, go, a small mortal creature
Farewell has long been said;

I for I already have forgotten you.

(Sensing the Emperor’s disappointment, the Traveller retreats into the shadows)

  Disappointment, bleed or
Stop bleeding
 round this dearest neck
the illustrious descendants of kingly wretches
I offer you a fair skin of my conscience
I offer you a curled into a ball fist
 I damsel, I unblest.
All the wolf hunger awakens.
Let the old mill continue to grind

 the compulsive grain of royal accusations.
let the heirs of the amen caves proudly limp,

dragging behind them the broken pots

 from the space that the Tarpeian furies created

from the rich, thick drapery 

of someone else’s blood.
THE ACCURSED, carefully-concealed step
will finish the last turn of my course of
travels, even as I began.
you, divine cans of preserved sacred, triune,
lo, the singing of the death raven 

of our eternal phantasmagoria of death
lo, the wailing of a wounded bird 

that flies peacefully in the frozen air

 will take care of us all.
So the satiated gods fell in love cannibalistically

 with their bloody children 

blurting forth a speech of madness,

(the indolent The St National Kitchen Passion)

(TRAVELLER drinks a jug of mead and disappears)



Light over light,

Dark over dark,

Steed galloping forsaken lonesome highways.

Loud as thunderous loss – to bitter ends, to

dust, in a lifetime, before waking.

Buried alive, taxidermy beasts go flying – 


Final reapers arrow nocked, taut drawn and 

tense – unleashing!

Artlessly affluently, elegantly bouquets 


The begonia adorning my flowerpot dying,

In this philodendron skin.

In absentia I meant to paint the walls with

brain matter,

After my bloodshot eyes read the final 

murderous thought,

Fibered glass textile like the shell of fancy 

colored synapses, under the forehead, 

Imhotep’s wisdom, Lovecraft’s magic,

The inscribed bones, a cockatrice,

This piece of furious serpent tale.

No glare, no piercing visage, 

No key to perceive me in lobotomy.

Pellucid crystalline aerosphere,

The sacral dragon of vanta shade,

Across razored skies,

Obsidian wings thrumming doom fly!

Hamlet simulating in perfect movie rhythms,

Dante’s substantiating time ticks in swells,

Juxtaposed in feverish schizophrenia 


Before the throbbing of sturdy matter,

Super nova’s howl echoed hearts,

From the first and final mire – damned.

When I’m dead.

When I’m dead,

I will find you.

And speak the language of lur-horn thunder,

A cold blooded foot in combustible sandals – 


Beware the cascade, escalate electricity,

Performing at violence in the villa.

Alveolae of the afternoon reduced to straight 

jacket tactics,

Marching, stomping, acrobatic rabble 


Celebrating mental health in madness, 


Throwing the meek from palatial spaceship


Here; the sobriquet means substantial will.

The banal grift gifts for the Boeotian and 


 Humanity splays massive and witless.

Light over light,

Dark over dark,

A Pooka in chains galloping forsaken 

lonesome highways,

Loud as thunderous loss – to bitter ends, to

 dust, in a lifetime.

 The hiatus between vomiting inferno and the

 retch pyre of regurgitation resound.


Looking back

(Irrumator…)… she remained in Belgrade deodamnatus for too long,

no less than twenty-five psychopathic landlords

during her ordeal.

money-laundering nazi rednecks

inconsequential,, just look back in laughter

weird amorphous blobs with their cellphones alight in their underwear

everything worked on a clan-like basis!

If you had an opinion you were fucked

inconsequential, look back in laughter

The convulsing man pulled a knife.

like a sailor and flinging at them the last remaining copies

of her poetry book

‘Cultist bastards! Out!’

‘Damn gargoyle, I will kill your twitchy ass with my bare hands’

(The Dark Will Understand… Irrumator..)

inconsequential, look back in laughter

all of the dinosaurs resting in her,

being revived in that final clench of humanity

for her

Diabolicus in Blockus against the stalker,

and what is stalking other than a performance par excellence

just look back in laughter

D’you know how many pharaohs lived through twenty with it?

I’ve read it, I swear!

The book’s called Eight-Month Fetus.

all of it is prenatal stress with brain damage

nihil ad rem, look back in laughter

akin to the wish for immortality

survived the 1991 Ustase slaughterhouse,

a gossip keeping track of world trends

and claiming to possess ‘encyclopedic knowledge’.

not an issue, look back in laughter

or try a few different blowdrying tricks

this time to reign in her hair she was never satisfied with,

not to mention bathing, pedicure,

the bus ride from one side of the room to the next

stercus accidit, just look back in laughter

Niels Bohr was a riot despite being a dickhead,

Wish I had a wonderful dream, namely,

I was in Dubai,in a luxury hotel,

fascinated by the mint on my pillow

and that Spartan dishes make me go nigh-insane

it doesn’t matter so look back in laughter

She’s been planning her death for years

.She wrote a cruel set of laws for herself,

and for others too.

She carefully used her at times bloody shirt

to hide the gorgon

she had been secretly growing on her tit

for years.

She dug her sharp venomous teeth

into it,the skin, used her flesh, skin, tit

as a sacrifice

for she had long decided

to set the clock, let it tick, until the end.

Look – look back in laughterGive, give

the imps surround and push me.

Look at her!How she struggles,

pushes us like we were beggars!

Look, look at the proud, desperate sorrow.

Gambled away, wasted away, haha!

take a look back in laughter– Are you insane?

Why not give money to me and my kids?

I sit here all day, begging by the fountain,

sleepin the public transportation,

and I used to have money like you.

Take care of all that money.

Don’t lose it, or we will be on equal footing,

and they’ll say

Look at the poor insane thing.

What’s with your head?


nota brevis, nota parvulus, look back in laughter

No apartments here

The meter was running.

Once was a beautiful woman

,brought onto Caucasus from Egypt

by the sons of Ommaya as per ibn Shaprut’s order,

the minister of Abd al-Rahman III and Sebikhasim,

was slandered and sold,

a demigoddess of full breasts,

hair and plump lips.profectos audiit, look back in laughter

rejected the Omayyad caliph,

he told Shaprut to sell Selima (her name)

to the Khazar king Josef

to do as he pleases, and this Hebrew king made

Selimathe slave-woman of Allah

Selima was like a bamboo

while a squealing breath of disgust escaped,

a breath of a justified EW!


look back in laughter

A bunch of psychopaths

which she met along the way

grew to a dynasty so powerful

that the torchbearer

allow them to serve him,not to butcher them

when he smells competition.

look back in laughter

Not a single NOBODY.

Nobody and somebody.

All is Nobody and Somebody.

When I eat I do not take the food at the table.

Books of wisdom make me feel nauseous

The numbers mean fate.


Look back… look at you, look at us…

Or would you prefer silence?

euge euge…

(prolonged cry)

Photo Credit: Saatchi ArtJoker Painting by Carlos Apartado


The Scream of the Butterflies

My head

is full of

wonder’s wind



I may


the times


in memories

that I will

see myself

with a brighter



and a rosier


whom shall I



that I



a thousand


if the eyes

of their horses




tell me,



that you



if the horse,

or the weapons,

or the war

is so beautiful?


that I


the emerald

the bird-green fountain,


it is known

that poets

and birds,

we are

the same.

And the water,

The forest,

the sky itself.


that I


the fluttering




they will

tell me,

they know,




do you hear

how, breaking

And break

the silence

thus well spoken


on land

and broken

on seas.

And with

a tremendous





in their blood,

the wretch






of desire!




And today

I see…

so dark

and desolate!

Should I



sand stars

feverishly shaking

looking around


the magnifying


of delusion

in each


of imago’s body,


on the inside

terror’s reign

of the gut,

nothing else,

as if


the scream

of the butterflies.



I shall

see them

if they have


I shall

place them

in the folds

of my garment,



the mantle


and with them

I shall


the quencher

of the kingdom,

from past riots.

Dying eyes,

let us

lament together.

My head

full of

wonder’s wind


where I



the times

that I

see myself

with a brighter



and a rosier


whom shall I


(By your





an unbroken


In solemn,




screamlike a butterfly).

Edited by: Obinna Eruchie, a poet who is very passionate about words for their meanings and sounds.


Frappadingue’s song

I haven’t kept kalendarium for kiloannum

Of all my thousand years

each they is more a sullen than the utopia before

it is pale shadow and growing paler


or corrupt data,

or transcription errors

came slowly overshadowing

All the world over that slowly dies.

No a race renowned of old have survived

and all the faces of tombstones are long gone

soon all the Shade Kings in the world will fall

the road are peopled with the fiends unmasked.

Frappadingue’s veil, ground connectors,

coronapocalypse towing whorled truck

and sky touchers carrying ack-ack gun

ack ack

looking for eye-stinging venom and sanguineous blood

Earth Candle, Matchstick.



the blue poison dart frogs habitat

A constellation of deranged chanting,

cheerleading pom poms.

A constellation of bondservant spreading Big Oaf’s


within a year there were holocaust on the phizog

on the moue

on lunges

on breather

on giblets

all your psyche

all your great gray matter

Behold the valley of slaughter

there has been flesh-eating

flesh-eating is the great fear

I wiggle

From clime to clime

Reeled into the canyon of maim

With mask, blade, and spear

Peace among nations, peace in our pigsties, acquires, bags, obtains, androids,

piece in our liberty and peace in the house of slaves.

Stay safe.


Nakot/Hunchbacks, butcher clowns, villains!

S oblakom na ledjima
Pajaci mesari
Reganine kćeri
Što mrzite moj dan
I sva moja jutra
Rođena iz rane
Blistavih narcisa
Lukrecijin nakote
Razmeniste otrove
Sabijen u krčage
Slatko melje
Da prauzrokom svojim
Uprlja nož
To umetnik celiva
Iskasapio noć
I ćutnje
Ali ja ću dalje čuti
Večni eho moje smrti

Hunchbacks, butcher clowns, villains!

With a cloud on their back
Butcher clowns
Regana’s daughters
Who hate my day
And all my mornings
Born from the wound
Of glistening narcissuses
Litter of Lucrecia
You exchanged venoms
Compressed into pitchers
In grinds sweetly
To stain the knife
With ancient cause
It is the artist osculating
He butchered the night
Of silence
And hush
But I will further hear
The eternal echo of my death.



Tonight, when Invisible Someone

from the bright celestial pitcher


blue moonlight on star fabric

I dreamed of Happiness in the cemetery

I think I didn’t

What I want to be,

And I am what I am not

the secret whisper of the cosmos,

a magical solution

of eternity

And slept, and dreamed till break of day

of the sun, the sky eyebrows with the bow of victory,

And a terrible tear.

A tear that calls. Phantasmagoria.

of Fireplace, of altar and refuge of all winds,

of the First Wild Horse and the First Woman,

On the bowels of wandering clouds,

Next, long memories,

And the moment of eternity,

In magic art:

To be lightly filled with happiness

and without the thread of a distracted Ariadne

no foam no sheets no thighs

Round night,

a river that flows into itself.

Here are the games,

ghosts, liturgies,

here, while everything is and is not.

for I am Phoenix in the sword

Voices not yet revived,which are yet to rush, buzz, roar and call,

I was in a headless world,

a flower thrown in the garbage

me and

caravaggio’s colors

in my eyes that spilled over you,

overjoyed palette

Tonight, when Invisible Someone

from the bright celestial jug

left the blue moonlight on the starry cloth,

I dreamed of Happiness in the cemetery

It was a happy accident

It was a dead man’s dream.



I will perforce

with some preludes


I’ll squirm in the dust

stalacpipe organ, play on

disturb the black bat flowers

biased and mutually intolerant

In return,

I will give up the drama of disintegration

I will count the beats of non-existent madness,

burn, the silver cathedral

to the nail of dawn

I stay in empty skin, a subtile fluid

I will cruelly quench my thirst in the deserts of the


I will act and speak with perfect liberty

And no one will hear the flowering of garbage

Some forces, some tokens

Some questions

some spices some aspirations

Bleed it out

Let it soak

and put down the curtain

the cloth of gold, fresh or frayed

The sound is lost with the last freight wan

she wouldn’t take a step.


Peace be upon her


POEMS FROM MY TRAVELS, Barcelona, Temple of Augustus

To right, to left from all sides slithering
the temple,
the Romans
the mutter and groan of the horses,
of Roman, the Romans, and their God, Augustus
going their rounds
Behold the steps of Traveller
while breath in fear entering wall stood high
give not up the flying fowl
miles and miles to the zunny sky,

Behold the Temple, now onrush like a thunderbolt’s book
her giant strength of letters bolted Emperor to the ground
all clothed upon with beauty
behold the flying fowl handing the bronze plate
with seven carved out letters BARCINO
crying through my years:
ere is my song, soared up to the heaven’s scream

is made by
from Traveller’s
hand invincible,
glorious but terrible
and a long time ago
and blest in all
himself unlike

I traveler, climbing rocks of emptiness
not all lost but two decades only
to Augustus shrine with undying grief
thus traveler of late so rude
long long decades of anxious waits
a passage opens across the sea of time
nor wait I more but my prosperious journey bent

in a gaggle of snakes slithering in and biting me,
crawling in my skin,
not the place where plants breathe in fear.
– It’s IT. Only IT. Waiting for me.

I feverishly dug in my imagination,
looking for shelter with my fear-filled eye.
I stand in front of roman wall
the marveling battle
stay of war god’s child

Lo! golden clay cold: remembrance, an infinite hourglass
lo towering sandstone columns by hour’s witch space
turned upside down again and again
overstepped the threshold of whimpering clock
come back, the time upfloated
could all be seen in a monstruous force of Eye
amidst my own clear waves with tear and shrieks torn

Suddenly appeared the Shadow of
aghast ghost Emperor stood in a purple tinge
in whispering tone
of unseen timbrels

“Traveler, still to weep you seem
you can’t turn back the clock”
“To go back
(how could I when I didn’t even…)
life congealed my inmost bowels
(but that’s not..)
I am breaking, like a tiny acrobat”.
“Traveler, sit with me, attend my shrine
play the brazen cymbal for this old king
on death’s brass shores
for the subversive returned to visit his ruins”
“Here, – I whispered back.
I step on the shadow.

Away fond thoughts out in the gloom
Commencing every single regret
Go, and return in glory Still is the story told,
How well Augustus kept Mars without the fall
between that night and this day

But you, Traveller, why so pale? Talk! Do mutter
some excuse
why seek the godlike kings so old
The whispering prince, Unconquered prince
are you disturbed, are you embittered
by endless changes, griefs of fortune
is it written in

El Confessionario en Lengua Tuya, your flimsie things
like stringes of wet stones
to praise the noble company present, and touches those regretful chords,
unfolding in a sorrowful directions
or is it… less marvelous deed, talk! drop it in liquid dew

Let me hear the whaesome tale, the mischief-flower
spreads out abodes of the gods in glittering splendor
with discreet art, behold a night watch flowers
they are arranged and placed
Cui bono? It rains down.
It rains down!

the traveler answers the emperor’s question in the second part of the poem
(Author’s Note)


First seal
And the lamb awoke to empirical thunder,
zirconium eyes wide open, blazing their lazuli

And so it begins, lamb stamps its holy hoof,
an earthquake hits and the first seal it splits

Terrifying realisation, that John the Revalator was true,
A time shattering voice it spoke, Come and see!

An echo manifestation within the dalliance clock,
equus of snow, nuclear winter bound

Words and actions of Hiroshima fire,
turning people to kyanite shadows on the ground

Second seal
And the second seal was torn asunder,
the atmosphere filled with a Hendrix haze

A swirling morass mixed by the hands of confusion,
trapped within the wheezing endurance of suffocation

Giving birth to Earth’s renewed decay scented abortion,
blood beast rider surging scarlet across the moraine

The turgid air cut by the mane’s flowing pestilence,
the land of Siena Brown left in the wake of its desolation

Infections spread with indiscriminate perfection,
as cities became a still blanket of millions slain

Third seal
And the third seal was languidly revealed,
bringing forth a dehydrated pool of lifeless ink

Ochre sand pours over emerald green fertile lands,
as roots wither to the unromantic kiss of drought

Everything now far from sublime, everything now is dying on the vine,
The obsidian canters through the fields and hills

No more harvests of the abundant, cadmium blue scales forever light,
malnourishment that schwarze starvation always yields

Match heads burnt out, all wrapped in hunger’s chains,
crystallised calcium formations, blow without refrain

Fourth seal
With a snapping crack, went the fourth, Pegasus strode dressed with frame baroque,
gilded with supernatural acanthus, It’s blooming irises formed of majestic plaster,

the speech of a rotten man strikes hard, now it lays inanimate on the ground,
in the background chaotic fire is burning, as the ghost stallion stretches out from foreground etched,

Expiring, Pegasus said: “You shall wither to nought, because you are unlike the Churches,
they are mute with wisdom: they know flags of coal hang today,

and tomorrow tricolours will fly, you have offended the one unseen, and because of that you will be blind”
I shall dong the bell of the trio, I will pluck the harps and harpies, and now awaken the clink of the spoon in the glass.

Buccephalus, Marengo and Comanche fell beside, only a mare of Mongolian origin and appetite remained,
devouring scrambled eggs, ale, Coke, and even poker chips, she consumed almost everything under the vault of heaven.

Fifth seal
And the pentagram seal set ablaze and became amethyst dust,
coffee cups with Jehovah written on them spilt and formed puddles of the pious,

Winter, summer, spring and autumn melded as one abomination,
freezing heat contained inside simultaneous, continuous, expiration and regeneration,

A jackal smiled and a baby died, parents consoled themselves by sniffing glue,
a leper yelled we “We do not need the judgement of Yahweh, we can judge ourselves well enough!”

He promptly turned to Human soup, whilst blood flowed north with magnetic polarity precision.
Frankincense groups gathered like diarrhoea, demanding cornflakes, anal fudge and restitution,

El Greco robes of sympathy were doled out, as time was reduced to patience,
now they await the arrival of festering brethren heads in baskets, for the organ harvest festival

Sixth seal

And the sixth seal was sliced, Abaddon stepped out of the sea of rage,
he was ridden by the faceless Medusa, and his flaming nostrils licked at the world,

Abaddon travelled the globe, accompanied by the wind that waved the tangled curls of senseless jellyfish,
under the curls of the Beast was engraved the name King Sumer, cursed Sumerian with all linguistics ergative,

Then came engulfing fire, rivers of blood and the stench of death,
as Fiji, Hawaii and Pompeii spewed their inner ejaculates,

the magma fell through the cracks in the crusted core,
and the ceremonial trumpet Pu was played, until the living dead could blow no more,

one candle was left to blaze with a pale flame and cause blindness,
mustard flames were stubbed out under the vault of heaven, leaving behind death and famine

Sixth seal part two

Medusa smiles shamelessly, projecting natural shyness, it is all but a feign,
chameleon snake, and chameleon Abaddon masked in human flesh,

Abaddon resembled an Angel of light and languidly flew away,
pouring a glass of rattlesnakes and moths into the lake of fire, lifting Medusa on his back, directions came from heaven:

“Measure the milk, put it on the flame just to warm it up, it must not boil. Put warm oil, yoghurt and egg in the warm milk.
Mix the liquid ingredients dry, form a soft, fine, non-sticky, pliable dough – Or dough, the oil will not be.”

Then giant cockroaches of questionable gaze and bloodshot eyes, cruised the oceans and the continents,
in jack boots, together with the desert locusts, then they set about their gnashing dance

They destroyed Kenya, Somalia, Ethiopia, Sudan, Djibouti and Eritrea. And everything on earth expired.
Then they went blind, running in their despair, lest they encounter some beast, or human being.

Seventh seal

And when he split the seventh seal, the earth was surrounded by great silence and not much time passed before the illusions began.
Then the sea organ and labiums played, and the thirty-five pipes under the stone framework produced a melody, in such a way that the waves inflated them with air.

And then a unicorn came to all the people and took them all on its back,
to taste the water of the enchantment, the Omaja- the water that splashes from the mill wheel, when the wheel rotates.

So the blind survived, they celebrate the day when the Unicorn came and they gather in its honour, they worship him devoutly, and above all,
spend cash and spill incense. They fornicate alone with the Unicorns holy fire and holy light.

And the anti social jellyfish sailed into the fire of hell, and the light of heaven descended on the Earth and a great fair began.
The Unicorn in flight kicking through the air, descends slowly falling into a whirlpool towards the earth,

the Unicorn spoke and farted at the same time, the Earth became crazy paved like an egg that had been discarded in Autumn’s solitude,
the retching began as ointment was applied to bursting piles, a conversation took place, but there were no words for it

Eighth seal

The eighth seal fizzled ajar, the inadequate bronze of the drunken battery thundered, the trumpets sobbed their wail frustration,
the company roared, and the men in black rode a white horse with hooves like a goat or a deer,

they are the hooves of a boxer, not the hoofs of a spear, and those riders will humiliate the nations of his enemies,
he will break their bones and pierce them with his succulent arrows, that fresh young unicorn.

Then he cursed human dwellings with the words “Our house is cursed, sick, hell!
And there is no day of God, when the blood would not spill out of the new wounds.”

And he was ridden by shadows that came out into the world, staggering in a trance,
followed by people with torches, if they were even people at all.

They spun in a circle and sang, wiping futile tears and falling to their unworthy knees before the invisible god.
Night is flowing, sleep is flowing, waking … Waking up would burn for a little while longer. Then trouble. Misery and shadows.

Eighth seal part 2

A pregnant woman arrives, dressed in a church robe. She lays her body down on the royal pedestal draped in gold, draping her heel into the floor.
Her eyes were piercing, like lighted Aegean torches around Lesbos as the light rushed into the shadows, in a playful hypnotic dance,

Like water whipping the shores of the sharp-toothed island of Lesbos, the pregnant woman is a paper dragon on a golden thread,
she goes into labour in a raging sea of thin, blackened blood, to which the Church and gleaming celluloid vehicles and cathode-ray rockets responded,

and they all stared at the distant corrupt, putrid stone temple,
a new manifestation of cruelty under the robe of repentance, this temple now trembles with cascading inner wrath,

and the pregnant woman surpassed the others with her height, rising like a canyon so spacious,
mad with arrogance, like a ship with outstretched sails, an Edwardian-style outfit, with the menacing gait of a tortured figure.

It was as if she had been trying to kill herself since the Bronze Age.
A snake tattoo appeared on her back. And the woman wet her hands and immersed them in the sea and played the hydraulophone.

Ninth seal

And the ninth seal vanished into thin air. Now it rises on Sunday night after sunset over the Adriatic mist and low clouds, observed from the top of Kiza in Dabarski
Kukovi on Velebit -A dried blood polar bear along with a beast in the shape of a Mad Horse, but with a beak, a deformed sea horse that none could have imagined,

and the churches betrayed the pilgrims and the great fair was visited by death, with accumulations of puss and subcutaneous carbuncles,
respiratory infections, rat fleas and buboes and viruses. Zombies and skeletons danced, rotting within the rotten of their poor flesh,

Now: the ruin of the flesh disease, the virus and the coronation of the Dragon, eyes like two dead black flowers and everything burns to ruin.
Dead eyes become the night, flesh turns into base atoms, flowers vein, hands droop, hands die to a heavy rhythm, Naked bodies dance in despair, to the danse macabre.

And as they danced around the golden calf, so they danced around the lamb’s shoulder,
with which they served a corpse flower salad as an addition to the turmeric scented meat

And the neutron bomb fell on all living creatures and crushed them in a cataclysm, and as the sun plunged into the sea,
darkness descended on the world as on the land of Egypt, only the black voices of the wind play the shadow game of echoes, from within the darkness still


This is the land of Basil the second and the belasitza of darkness, and the ball is burning.
With peace and darkness, the lights shine with dark sorrow,

your voice, is the voice, that is voiced, in a loud amplified voice. And there is no one on this galley,
to break the masts, alas on the ground, last person standing, upright in a one eyed herbal scarecrow’s soil

there is an echo of hope, that the last woman on earth shall play the Russian balalaika,
the sun giggles burlesquely, and touches the strings of this fiery instrument, I hear you now, I hear your voice

The words and music terraform the marble, using the fertiliser of desolations twisted rooted teeth,
all that is endothermic and exothermic come together like the beast with two backs,

Zarathustra also spoke like a psychic from beyond the grave, now the last woman Lucy, proudly lifts her arms like an obilisk raised,
Windscale in her hands, with miniature fissions wrapped in fusions, and inextinguishable amaranthine flames

(Windscale by the way was the name of our nuclear power plant before it got changed to Sellafield.)

©® Leila Samarrai